Wishing Him Back
by sparozina
Summary: Scully got three wishes from Genia. When she messes them up, it's Mulder who has to pay the price. (Alternate ending for Je Souhaite) Dedicated to my dogs.
1. First wish

DISCLAIMER: I don't own the characters. No copyright infringement is intended.

"I can't go. You unrolled me," Genia said simply.

Scully stared at her while Mulder chuckled.

"Looks like you got yourself three wishes, partner," he teased. Scully turned to him, opening her mouth, but closed it without commenting. It was late, she was tired and not in the mood for games.

"Good night, Mulder," she sighed, deciding to go home, while completely ignoring Genia's presence.

"Scully, wait!" Mulder made his panic face. "What about your wishes?"

"Mulder, I don't believe…"

"You don't have to believe it, Scully," he insisted. "You can have a scientific proof, right here, right now!"

"I'm really not in the mood…"

"What's the problem, Scully? Are you afraid to face the truth? To be proven wrong, and me right? Come on, Scully, this is our chance, once for all!"

"Mulder, this is ridiculous!"

"If you want," Genia interrupted them. "You can give up your wishes and I'll be on my way."

"That sounds wonderful," Scully sighed, knowing very well that Mulder wouldn't let her get out that easily. When he got his mind on something he wouldn't let go, forgoing reason and intellect.

"No!" Mulder objected, just as Scully predicted. "No, she doesn't want to do that! Come on, Scully, what do you wish for?"

"Other than a long bath and a good night's sleep?" she asked longingly. Mulder didn't take a hint, of course he didn't!

"Yes, Scully, other than that!" he urged her. "Something grand! Think big! Think of the difference you can make for your life, or our work, or heck, for the whole humanity!"

"I just wish you'd stop talking," she said sincerely, suppressing a yawn.

"Done," she heard Genia behind her and turned towards her, confused. "What do you mean?"

"Your wish is granted," Genia smiled. Scully just stared at her for a second, afraid to turn back to Mulder. He couldn't be right, not this time, not about something like this, not… Oh God! She remembered Mr. Gilmore and his sealed mouth. If this woman somehow did that to Mulder, she was going to kill her, Genia or not! And then…

Mulder will never forgive her!

He wasn't talking anymore, that was certain. Scully slowly turned back to him, her heart racing. She was afraid, very afraid. It was one thing to be the voice of reason for his crazy theories, but without his belief her skepticism just wasn't as strong.

She silently begged him to speak again, just to prove that he can. But he didn't and her heart sunk in her heels when she finally saw him. He didn't look like Mr. Gilmore, that's true, but the sight in front of her was something much, much worse.

And he… It… didn't talk, all right! It… He… barked.


	2. Second wish

On Mulder's chair, wrapped in Mulder's clothes, was a big dog. It barked once, then quickly looked around, as if his own voice scared him. German Shepherd, Scully decided, even though the dog's breed was the least of her concerns at the moment. She was a dog lover, she couldn't help it.

"Where is Mulder?" she asked firmly, keeping her eyes locked on the dog, whose ears twitched on the mention of her partner's name.

"You're looking at him," Genia said casually, with the hint of boredom in her voice. "He doesn't talk, just as you demanded."

"I didn't demand anything," Scully insisted. "That… That wasn't supposed to be a wish!"

"You said 'I wish'," Genia reminded her.

"I never said 'dog'," Scully pointed out.

"No," Genia agreed. "But you didn't rule out a dog, either."

"Oh, God!" Scully gasped. The dog was looking at her now, and there was no doubt he had Mulder's eyes. It was Mulder's gaze, begging her to fix him, like he always does. But this time, she wasn't sure that she can.

"Are you ready for your next wish?" Genia asked, faking patience.

"What?" Scully was still staring at the dog, almost forgetting Genia's presence. "No, I… I need to think. I need to fix this mess. Just leave me alone for a while, would you?"

"Is that your wish?" Genia inquired.

"Yes!" Scully snapped, without thinking. "That's my wish! Just go!"

At the moment she said it, she realized it was a huge mistake. "No, I didn't mean that!" she pleaded, but Genia was already gone.

Damn!

Genia's disappearance upset the dog as well. He barked twice, then jumped off the chair and shook the clothes off. He whined, looking expectantly at Scully.

"Mulder," Scully gasped. "Is it really you?"

At the sound of her voice, dog started to wag his tail happily. Scully crouched in front of him and reached with her hand to stroke his head. It seemed to please him. For a moment Scully forgot how she ended up with a dog in her office, she was just glad that he was there. She missed having a dog.

"Agent Scully?" she heard Skinner's voice behind her and jumped to her feet. How did she miss hearing him come in?

"Sir…" she had no idea what to say.

"I thought I heard a dog in here," Skinner noted. "What is going on? What is this animal doing in here?"

"This," Scully pointed to the dog. "I'm afraid this is Mulder…" No. She couldn't tell Skinner the truth. She was the reasonable one. Besides, he would never believe her. She didn't truly believe it herself, even though it was happening right in front her eyes, or behind her back, more precisely. Paranormal activities tended to happen just behind her back, all the time.

"…Mulder's dog," she finished the sentence sheepishly.

"Since when did Mulder get a dog?" Skinner eyed her suspiciously. It was hard for her to keep his gaze and lie straight to his face, but telling the truth seemed way harder.

"His… umm… uncle suddenly died, sir," she was thinking fast. "And nobody else was available to take the dog, so Mulder brought him here."

"I'm going to kick his ass," Skinner was not pleased. "This is the Federal Bureau of Investigation, not an animal shelter! Where is that partner of yours?"

"He left early to make funeral arrangements," Scully was talking smoothly now, gaining back her confidence. "His uncle didn't have children, so there isn't really anybody else to…"

Mulder interrupted her with a bark, but one angry look from her was enough to shut him up.

"I'm sorry about this, sir," she continued before Skinner had a chance to comment further. "I was just about to take him home with me."

"You're taking him to your place?" Skinner was suspicious.

"Mine is bigger," she said simply. She wasn't taking him to Mulder's appartment, that's for sure. You couldn't expect from a dog to live alone, even when the said dog used to be Mulder.

"Let's go, Mulder," she called him when it seemed that Skinner was ready to leave it at that.

"His name is Mulder?" Skinner raised an eyebrow.

"Mulder's uncle wasn't very creative," Scully sighed. "So he named the dog after himself."

"You know what, I don't care," Skinner concluded, scratching the top of his head. "Just get him out of here."

"Yes, sir," Scully said, hoping he wouldn't notice that she didn't even have a leash. She still had Queequeg's leash in the desk's drawer, but Mulder was much larger dog and the collar wouldn't fit him.

On the way home she called her mother, asking her to go to the pet store and get some dog food and a new leash. For her partner, but she deliberately failed to mention that part.

"I said 'for a while', Mulder," she assured the dog who was sitting on the passenger's seat. "Not forever! She only left for a while, but she will come back and I will fix this. I still have one wish left, and I will not mess up this time."

Of course, 'for a while' could have meant a few hours. Or a few years…

Mulder licked her hand fondly, seeming more at ease than she felt. Of course, he would be content, he was a dog! Even if he wasn't, being taken to his partner's home with a promise of leash and food was probably one of his biggest fantasies.


	3. Scully's place

As soon as they entered Scully's apartment, Mulder jumped on the couch and started to lick his balls.

"Yes, Mulder," Scully rolled her eyes. "Do feel at home."

She should have left him at his place, she thought. He would have been fine for the night and she could check him out before and after work. It's just that it seemed too cruel. He must have been scared, going through such an unbelievable experience, and she was literary the only friend he had left.

Not that he had many more friends as a human, but still… Besides, Genia could return at any moment and Scully wanted him around when that happened.

"I will not screw up my last wish," Scully chanted in her head. "I will NOT screw up my last wish!"

She went to the kitchen, took down a bowl and filled it with water. When she returned to the living room Mulder was still busy with basic hygiene. She stood there, holding the bowl, feeling awkward as hell.

"You must be thirsty," she finally said, forcing a smile. Mulder raised his head, looking way cuter than a grown dog is supposed to look. "If you keep this up I might just keep you," Scully thought to herself and her smile grew more genuine.

"Woof!" Mulder barked, jumped from the couch and approached his partner. She crouched to his level, placing the bowl on the floor in front of him, and watched him drink it, fast and loudly.

"Good boy," she said automatically, but as soon as those words reached her brain she covered her mouth with her hand and jumped to her feet. What was she doing? Treating her partner like a real dog? The cutest, smartest, most obedient dog she ever had…

God, she wanted him! It was so wrong on so many levels, but she was dog-less for too long and she yearned so much for a warm, hairy friend to come home to, and this sweet, lovely thing with Mulder's eyes…

God, what was wrong with her?

She walked away, trying to get some distance, but Mulder followed her. When she stopped, he took advantage of her stillness and hugged one of her legs with both of his front ones, getting ready to…

"Oh no, you don't!" Scully pushed him away. "I have guns, Mulder, remember? Mine AND yours."

Mulder whined and sat down, offering his pawn in apology. Scully smiled, accepting it. She couldn't stay mad at her partner for long and she definitely had a soft spot for dogs. It will be hard to set boundaries for this one and prevent him from taking advantage of her in any way he could think of. Special Agent Dana Scully didn't have many weaknesses, but tail wagging little monsters were always her undoing.

The door bell rung, causing Mulder to growl.

"It's ok," Scully assured him. "It's just my mom."

Mulder was still suspicious, but when he saw Maggie and sniffed her thoroughly, he started to happily jump on and around her. Scully rolled her eyes at this exaggerated show of affection.

"Good boy," Maggie stroked him, feeling instant connection. "What's his name?" she asked her daughter.

"Mulder," Scully said simply, taking her bags and leaving them on the coffee table, while Maggie played with her partner.

"God, will he remember any of this?" Scully thought. "And if he doesn't and I tell him, will he be able to believe me? This is a little too far-fetched even for Mulder. If I tell him, I will probably lose all my credibility in his eyes for-about-ever."

"Does he know?" Maggie's voice brought her back from her thoughts.

"Does who know what?" Scully was confused.

"Fox, of course!" Maggie exclaimed. "That you love him!"

"I don't know what you're talking about," Scully tried to brush her off. But she knew, of course she knew. She wasn't getting younger and her mother was annoyingly aware of that.

"He loves you, too, I can see that," Maggie was just being a mother.

"Mom, I don't…"

"You even named your dog Fox!"

"What? I didn't… This isn't… His name is Mulder, not Fox! It would be silly to name a dog Fox."

"Not as silly as naming a child Fox," Maggie smiled fondly.

"Mom… This has nothing to do with my partner!" Scully insisted.

Nothing!

Nothing!

Nothing!

Except everything…

Scully sat on her couch, feeling beat. She couldn't force herself to retell the stupid story about Mulder's uncle. She would just leave her mother to enjoy her love fantasy and plan the imaginary wedding. That scenario suddenly felt more believable than Scully's reality. Who cares, either way? It won't bring him back…

"Oh honey, I'm sorry," Maggie sat next to her and reached for her hand, holding it protectively. "I didn't mean to upset you. It's really none of my business."

Only then Scully realized that she was crying. Mulder must have realized it at the same moment because he immediately jumped on the couch by her other side and started to lick her tears.

"Mulder, stop that!" Scully couldn't help but to chuckle. He was all over her face and instead of stopping he was only getting more persistent.

"Enough!" Scully was laughing now, pushing him away but without any of her previous authority. "All right! All right! I love you too!"

It was such an easy thing to say to a dog.

Maggie had no idea that she just witnessed exactly what she was hoping for.


	4. Morning walk

Going to sleep was a bit tricky. Mulder wasn't happy with sleeping on the couch in the living room. He whined and scratched on Scully's bedroom door, until she had to let him in.

"All right, Mulder," she yawned. "But you sleep on the floor!"

Mulder was already on her bed, tilting his head adorably, as if he couldn't comprehend how she could possibly want him down.

"Come on, boy," Scully insisted, throwing one pillow on the floor. "You didn't sleep on the bed when you were human, so why start now?"

"Woof!" Mulder responded. He obediently jumped from the bed and tried to make himself comfortable on a pillow that was way too small for him.

Scully chuckled. "If that doesn't work for you, you can always go back to the couch. I'll leave the door open."

"Woof!" Mulder repeated. He placed his front legs on the pillow and lowered his head on them, intensely watching Scully's every move. She stroked him once, then went to bed, reluctant to turn the light off. They just stared at each other for a while.

"Goodnight, Mulder," Scully finally said. "I… No matter your shape, it's nice to have you here. I just hope I'll have your old self back soon. God, how on Earth will I explain your absence to Skinner?"

"Woof," Mulder suggested. It made just about as much sense as their conversations usually do. Scully smiled fondly and turned off the light. She thought she would never be able to sleep, but her exhaustion took over quickly and she slept deeply and peacefully, guarded by her loyal partner.

She was awaked too soon, though, by the same partner's tongue all over her face.

"Mulder," she murmured. "What's the time?"

"Woof!" Mulder answered, which didn't tell her much. She didn't expect an accurate answer, anyway, since it never happened with him. It was always: "Scully, the evidence is gone!", "Scully, I need you on the next plane to Nowhere!", "Scully, I hate bugs!" or "Scully, I'm covered with blood and it isn't mine."

She checked the clock, it was barely past five. Seeing her starting to get up, Mulder run away and returned before her feet reached the floor, holding the leash.

"All right, I get the message," Scully yawned. "Let me just take a quick shower first."

Mulder was still holding the leash when she came out of the bathroom and she kicked him out of the bedroom to get dressed in private. He whined, acting offended, but this time it didn't help him.

"All right," Scully stroked him when she finally made herself presentable. "Let's go for a walk, then we will stop by your place to feed the fish."

She was always too slow for Mulder, but now he was pulling her so strongly that she had to run after him. She was relieved when he stopped to pee for the first time, but after sixth time she was getting annoyed. He was taking this dog-life way too seriously.

When they reached the park, Scully unleashed him, begging him to behave. Luckily, he didn't seem to have any desire to leave her. He didn't bother other dogs and he was friendly to people. It was a lovely walk and Scully didn't even mind picking up after him. It has always been part of her job, in a way.

"Nice dog," a random man approached Scully.

"Thank you," she smiled politely, while Mulder eyed him suspiciously.

"How old is he?" the man asked.

"Um…" Scully tried to quickly calculate Mulder's age in dog years. "He's about six."

"Best years," man said stupidly. Mulder started to growl at him.

"Hey buddy," random man reached to him. "It's ok, dogs love me!"

Not this dog. This dog grabbed his hand and bit hard, not letting go. The man screamed and Scully barely managed to set him free.

"What the hell were you thinking?" she scolded Mulder, while taking him out of the park. He whined miserably and walked with his tail between his legs. Even when he was taller than her, Scully could easily intimidate him, so looking at her angry face from below was a truly scary experience.

"I wasn't in any danger, he was just trying to be nice," Scully continued, but suddenly stopped, turning to Mulder. "Don't tell me you were jealous!"

Mulder didn't even hear her. He was already running after a squirrel.

"Mulder, come back here!" Scully yelled after him, but he ignored her and kept running. She had no choice but to run after him. Luckily, he didn't go far, or maybe it wasn't so lucky, since she found him with his nose buried in an impressive pile of poo.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?" she pulled him away, attaching the leash to his collar. Mulder licked his muzzle happily, unamused with her nagging.

"You are NOT a real dog," Scully insisted. "Stop acting like one!"

A passing-by jogger gave her a very suspicious look, but went on running. Smart move, because Scully was already contemplating pulling her gun on him. Or on Mulder. Or herself. She urgently needed a bad guy (preferably a monster) to vent some of her frustration on. All Mulder needed, on the other hand, was to sniff another tree and leave his mark over some other dog's pee.


	5. Home alone

Mulder was happy. He had Scully, food and water. She was taking good care of him, and took him to awesome walk. He protected her from other people, and generously forgave her for not being grateful about that. She was just a human, after all. Humans always think they can take care of themselves, never appreciating help. So much was clear to him now and he almost wondered how he never realized such simple truths before. _Almost._ There was no point to waste time thinking, he needed to seize every moment.

Then Scully did the unthinkable. She left the apartment, WITHOUT him. She changed into her formal clothes and shoes, stroked him once and said something he couldn't understand, then she walked out of the door and locked it behind her. Just like that. She left without him!

Mulder barked at the door, but it didn't do much good. He scratched the door and whined, but that didn't work either. How could she forget him? How could she not hear him calling her? Something must have happened! Someone must have attacked her! Maybe she's dead? Is she dead? That would be the only reasonable explanation. If she was alive, she would certainly come back for him!

Scully is dead… Mulder's heart broke to million pieces and he threw himself on the floor heavily, losing the will to live. He vaguely remembered Scully almost dying before. He remembered blood dripping from her nose, but he didn't remember how it smelled. He couldn't remember any smell or sound, and Scully seemed much smaller in his memories. How was it possible? Mulder remembered jumping on her bed and kissing her on the cheek without using his tongue. Why did he do such a thing? What kind of kiss was that? He placed his paw in her hand and wrapped his fingers with hers. Wait, what? He had _fingers_? His front legs were… _arms_? Oh my God, he used to be human! Wait until Scully hears that! She will never believe him! Where is she?

Mulder jumped and run through the apartment, looking for Scully, but he couldn't find her anywhere. Everything smelled like her, but she just wasn't there. No one was there, Mulder was all alone in the world, abandoned and forgotten.

He couldn't take it. It was too much! He jumped on the couch and buried his head under the pillow in silent desperation, but it didn't help lessen his anxiety. Angrily, he grabbed the pillow and shook it fiercely, then placed it between his paws and started to rip it apart with his strong jaw. The pillow stuffing flew all around him, but it didn't give him peace of mind. Frustrated, he jumped back on the floor and looked around, searching for a new target. Two plants were soon turned over and he frantically dug in their soil, but found nothing there. Not bothering to clean his paws he rushed to the kitchen, leaving dirty marks all over the carpet. Guided by the smell he found the trash can, tipped it over and took out all of its contents. He ate what was eatable, and some of what wasn't, then got thirsty and went to the bathroom, remembering the sound of water that came from there in the morning when Scully was taking a shower.

Scully! Million pieces of his heart broke each into another million pieces.

He found water in the toilet, had a sad, lonely drink, then went to the bedroom and jumped on the bed, finally taking a rest. He fell asleep on the pillows that smelled more of Scully than any other thing in the apartment (except maybe for the basket with dirty clothes), and his beloved human came back to him in his dreams.

Mulder dreamed of chasing monsters in dark woods and empty buildings, and he never cared if he actually caught one or not, the thrill was in the chase and Scully by his side. If he caught a monster he got a treat from Scully, if he didn't he got to play with them again tomorrow, and if he got hurt he was allowed to sleep in Scully's lap. He was free to go wherever he wanted, and even if it made Scully mad she would still be there waiting for him when he got back.

Then Queequeg came to his dreams and he woke up feeling depressed. Scully had another dog! That's why she left him! She chose that rat over him! How could she! He trusted her and she betrayed him! She took another dog for a walk! She even stroked him, over and over and over again!

It was too much. Defeated, Mulder left the bed and went back to the kitchen. He started to chew the table's leg but it only made him more desperate. It tasted like wood and smelled like nothing. He needed something stronger. Sniffing around, he finally found one of Scully's shoes and started destroying it. It wasn't much of a pleasure, but still better than wood.

As engaged as he was in the shoe business, he didn't miss the sound of footsteps. He raised his head, listening intently, and the footsteps grew louder as they kept coming closer and closer, until they stopped at the door, which slowly opened.

It was Scully! Alive! Healthy and well! She didn't even smell of another dog! She was all his and she was all here! Mulder was delirious. He jumped at her, trying to reach her nose with his, but she yelled at him and pushed him away.

"What the hell happened here?" Scully looked around, bewildered. Mulder didn't completely understand her words, but he understood her tone of voice. She sounded mad, very mad. Why wasn't she happy to see him? Why didn't she let him greet her? What did he do to upset her?

She started to yell some more and Mulder got scared and run to the bedroom, looking for cover. He tried to squeeze under the bed, but was too big for that. The closet door was open and he finally went inside, curled there as best as he could, and shook in fear of his owner's completely unreasonable and unexplainable wrath.


	6. Falling in love

"Mulder, come out of the closet," Scully repeated for the third time, but Mulder still ignored her.

"Thank God Genia's not here," she sighed. "If she heard what I'm saying to you, she would turn you into a homosexual!"

Scully had no idea why, but that idea terrified her. She didn't want to see her partner with a man, but then again, she didn't like seeing him with a woman, either. His tapes, on the other hand, were not much of a threat. She could handle the tapes.

"Your tapes, Mulder," she smiled. "If you were gay, you would have to replace them. Or maybe you wouldn't? I never actually saw what's on them…"

She wide opened the closet door and stared at a shivering dog who curled himself even further, whining miserably.

"You're in shock," she declared. It was the standard diagnosis that she appointed to Mulder at least twice a week, practically since she'd met him. She wasn't going to change her mode of work just because Mulder was a dog now, but she did offer him a treat instead of a blanket this time.

"I'm sorry, Mulder," she sighed, getting down on the floor. Mulder approached her carefully, sniffed the treat and took it, chewing it without looking at her, ready to return back in the closet at even the tiniest sign of her rage.

"It's my fault," Scully told him gently. "I shouldn't have left you alone. This must be scary for you and I keep forgetting that you are a dog."

She kept forgetting that he was human, too, but she didn't tell him that.

Finally, Mulder relaxed and placed his head on Scully's lap, enjoying her petting.

"I'm going to ask my mom to stay with you tomorrow," she promised. "Or would you rather I take you to her place?"

Mulder ignored her.

"My mom, Mulder," Scully repeated. "You like her, don't you?"

Still no response.

"Maggie?" Scully tried, but that didn't get her a reaction either.

"Mrs. Scully?" she tried next. That got Mulder's attention. He raised his head, looked her in the eyes and barked approvingly.

"All right, it's Mrs. Scully then," Scully smiled and Mulder barked again, wagging his tail.

"Good boy," Scully smiled and Mulder returned his head to her lap, nudging her hand to keep stroking him. She obliged, enjoying the moment just as much as he did. It felt wrong to call him "boy", but how was she supposed to call him? Man? Good man? Good Mulder? Good partner? She tried all of those in her head, but each sounded weirder than the previous. Just when she thought their relationship couldn't get any stranger, Mulder got turned into a dog, took advantage of her weakness for dogs, moved into her place (and set on destroying it) and she couldn't even be mad at him. Instead, she was falling in love…

"Married men weren't a good enough challenge for you, Dana?" she silently scolded herself. "Destroying families wasn't enough of a thrill for you? This partnership is the best thing that ever happened to you, don't you dare to destroy it as well!"

She sighed and closed her eyes, getting lost in thought. Mulder definitely showed her another way. He taught her how to get lost in work, and use all that destructive inner energy for something good, like saving lives instead of destroying them, but still, from time to time some handsome sheriff appeared, or sometimes a tattooed guy or sleek writer…

She felt warmth appear between her legs and opened her eyes to find Mulder's nose buried down there, sniffing intensely.

"Mulder, no!" she pushed him away, getting up. Mulder whined, sounding disappointed, even offended.

"Don't give me that look!" Scully scolded him. "And don't try that again! At least not before you're human again…"

Oh God, what is she saying? She left the room hurriedly, hoping Mulder didn't understand her. What possessed her to say such a thing? Not that she would mind… No! Not that she WOULDN'T mind…

Oh God, Dana, just stop THINKING!

Scully busied herself with cleaning while Mulder mated with her pillow. She made a mental note never to allow that pillow back to her bed.

Then she called her mother.

"I don't know, Dana, he's so big," Maggie was hesitant.

"He's gentle and obedient," Scully insisted. "He won't be any trouble."

"Why didn't you get a smaller dog?" Maggie inquired.

Scully sighed. "I guess that should be my third wish."

"What do you mean?"

"Nothing, mom. I'm asking for a favor here, not for your judgement about my choice of men."

"Men?" Maggie was confused. "Who said anything about men?"

"Dogs," Scully corrected herself. "I meant dogs."

"All right, Dana," Maggie finally agreed. "I'll stay with him. Can you at least leave early from work?"

"No, I can't," Scully sighed. "Skinner gets pissed if Mulder and I are both absent."

"Fox? Is he missing again?"

"No. No, he's here."

"With you?"

"Yes. I mean, no! He's… on a vacation."

"I thought Fox doesn't take vacations," Maggie was suspicious.

"His uncle died," Scully said. "Look, I have to go. See you tomorrow?"

"All right, Dana," Maggie agreed. "Take care."

"You too, mom. Love you."

Finally, the conversation was done with. Mulder seemed to be done with the pillow, as well. He was sitting by the door now, holding a leash and looking adorable.

"All right, Mulder," Scully smiled. "Let's go for a walk, and then I'm taking you to a pet store to get some toys for you, so that you can leave my remaining plants alone."

"Woof!" Mulder agreed, dropping the leash in the process. He quickly picked it up again and wagged his tail happily when he realized Scully got the message and was already putting her sneakers on.


	7. All things

"Beef," Scully decided, taking the bag of beef flavored dog food from the shelf.

"You like beef," she turned to Mulder, showing him her choice. He sniffed the bag and growled, looking displeased.

"Okay then, what is it that you want?" Scully asked him and he looked at her hopefully. "And no, it can't be human food! It's not good for your… current body."

Mulder made a grumpy noise that sounded just like the one he always made as human when she brought him salad for lunch. Scully chuckled. They understood each other just the same even when one of them was a dog. She wasn't sure whether to consider that to be a compliment or an odium for their communication skills.

"How about chicken?" she went on browsing. There was no sound from Mulder, so she assumed it was okay and placed it in the cart. Mulder was placing something there as well. Scully stared at the little green toy of his choice, then at his adorable, tilted face that watched her expectantly.

Even as a dog, Mulder managed to find an alien.

Scully sighed and bought it for him.

She took him to his place next, with an intent to get some of his clothes. She figured he would need them when Genia came back and turned him into human again. He would definitely come back naked, unless she decided to specify clothing in her last wish, but where would the fun be in that?

No, she will definitely not specify it. It would be a payback for what he did to her pillow!

Mulder was composed in the car, but started to get excited when he recognized his street, his building. He pulled like crazy to the elevator, then to the apartment number 42. Once inside, she unleashed him and he started to examine the place from his new perspective, intensely sniffing everything.

Scully fed the fish first and checked their vital signs. She had planned to do that before work, but dealing with Mulder's mischief in the park took too much time. Luckily, the fish seemed to be doing fine.

The place was a mess, though. Scully was starting to think that Mulder's rampage at her apartment was simply him trying to make it feel more like his own home.

She went to the bedroom to browse his closet, but she didn't get that far. There were clothes all around the room: on the bed, on the chair and on the floor, so she picked up one shirt and brought it to her face. It smelled like Mulder, _human_ Mulder. She closed her eyes, remembering.

Dog Mulder followed her. He sat in front of her and whined to get her attention.

"What now?" Scully opened her eyes, feeling a bit annoyed. Mulder looked at the bed, then back at her, suddenly very calm and serious.

"I don't want to talk about it," she brushed him off and closed her eyes again, feeling embarrassed. She knew what the dog was referring to, but she wasn't sure how to feel about it. It was something she wasn't ready to deal with, it happened so recently, after all. Was she more ashamed of walking out on him that morning, or of spending the night with him? She didn't know, but she was well aware that this was the first time after that night that she was in his bedroom again. Mulder, apparently, was just as much aware of it.

One lonely night she invited Mulder to her bed.

He said no.

"You would hate me later," he explained. "You would hate yourself even more."

Another, not so lonely, night she fell asleep on his couch. He covered her with a blanket, went to change the sheets on the bed and came back to wake her up.

"You are not comfortable like this, Scully," he said. "Go to bed. I just made it."

"Where will you sleep?" she wondered, only half-awake.

"With you," he answered, simply. She gave him a puzzled look, but his eyes were serious. They gazed at each other for a while, lost in the moment, in the other, and in all the talk about fate that they had before she dozed off. It felt like it was time, like they didn't really have a choice anymore.

"All right," Scully finally nodded and Mulder offered his hand, pulled her up and led her to his bedroom.

It wasn't love making. It was destiny, friendship and protection. No kissing. Nothing but two people being lonely together. Just that once, because neither of them could bear reducing their relationship to casual sex. They couldn't be together either, of course not, neither of them even thought of that. Scully didn't, at least.

"Woof," Mulder barked, determined to get her attention.

"No," Scully shook her head, not looking at him. "It would never work."

"Woof," Mulder disagreed.

"Please, don't…" she turned away from him, still clutching his shirt, holding it close to her heart. "You need to find someone who can give you a child. A family…"

He started to whine now and it broke her heart. Mulder was a lonely, damaged man, who suffered too much. His whole family was gone, leaving him as the last one who can carry on the legacy. It shouldn't end with him. It would be selfish of a barren woman to keep him for herself, even if seeing his baby with another woman killed her in the end.

Scully quickly wiped her eyes to stop the tears from coming. This wasn't time for self-pity. There wasn't much danger of Mulder reproducing with another woman at the moment, and if anything she should worry about him having puppies with another bitch.

The thought of puppies brought a smile to her face. Seeing her mood lighten made the dog happy. Wagging his tail, he turned around, went to the dresser and tried to open one particular drawer. Scully observed him, puzzled by his actions. It took him a while, but he wasn't a quitter. Finally, the drawer was opened and Mulder buried his head in it, coming out with a bra in his mouth. Scully chuckled and took it from him.

"Thank you, Mulder," she giggled, placing it back in the drawer. "But I didn't forget this. I left it here on purpose. You know, as a… souvenir? It beats the shirt with crop circles that you brought me from England, doesn't it?"

"Woof," Mulder agreed.

"I am, however, taking some of _your_ underwear with me," Scully declared, starting to browse other drawers. "Hopefully, you're going to need them soon. Don't get too comfortable being a nudist!"

She quickly picked up some basic clothes, along with the smelly shirt from the floor and asked Mulder if he was ready to go. He seemed to be more accustomed to his new body by this point, and his ability to understand her increased.

"Well trained," Scully thought to herself, suppressing a smile. It would be a compliment for a dog, but not so much for the rebel agent that she worked with.

She went towards the apartment door, but Mulder didn't follow her. He ran to the couch instead and jumped on it, placing his front legs on the arm holder and staring at his fish.

"Let's go, Mulder," Scully called him, but he refused. He whined and rearranged his front paws nervously, keeping his gaze fixed on the aquarium.

"Mulder!" Scully repeated, louder this time. Mulder gave her a quick look, then turned back to the fish.

"We can't take them with us," Scully sighed. "We'll come back tomorrow, I promise. The fish will be fine. Come on, we have to go!"

Mulder really, really, really didn't want to go. He whined and complained while Scully attached leash to his collar and pulled him away. He was still sad when they arrived back to Scully's place, so much that he refused to eat his dinner.

"Come on, Mulder," Scully stroked him. "If you can eat my garbage and other dogs' poop, how bad can the proper food for dogs be?"

Mulder ignored her.

"Do you prefer what my mom bought?" Scully asked, but there was no reaction.

"Mrs. Scully," she corrected herself. "Would you like to eat what Mrs. Scully bought for you?"

His tail wagged a little at the mention of Mrs. Scully, but other than that he remained unresponsive. Scully didn't know what to do. She even offered him her own dinner, but that was something he'd refuse even as a happy human. Maybe he just needed a break. He spent entire day being a dog and seeing his place and his fish must have made all this too real for him.

"Don't worry, I'll fix it," Scully promised him. He licked her hand gratefully, but didn't cheer up.

Not knowing what else to do for him, Scully finally invited him to her bed. She figured he was already sleeping in it while she was at work and now she was too tired to change the sheets. It wasn't like she never had him in her bed, covered in mud, blood or _something_. Having him as dog wasn't all that bad, after all.


	8. Mother's instinct

Maggie wasn't entirely comfortable with taking care of a big dog.

"You'll do fine," Scully tried to assure her. "You know Mulder."

"I only met him two days ago," Maggie pointed out.

"Well, that's enough," Scully insisted. "Dogs are… just dogs. They don't hide their feelings. What you see is what you get. And I see you two bonding with each other just fine."

 _Just fine_ was an understatement. Maggie was sitting on the couch with Mulder lying next to her and his head was resting in her lap. Maggie stroked him so fondly that Scully was almost jealous. That's the thing about people, they _do_ hide their feelings.

Scully was particularly good at hiding hers, at least when it came to people. But when it came to dogs… Her armor was rapidly falling apart and it scared her, a lot. At least she still had her work to distract her from this weird relationship with her dog.

Her partner! Not dog, partner!

"Mom, listen," she said, very seriously. "Nothing can happen to him while I'm gone. Do you understand?"

"What could happen?" Maggie was confused. "Is he sick or something?"

"No, he's not sick," Scully assured her. "He's perfectly healthy and I want him to stay that way. I _need_ him to."

"Dana, I've been dog sitting before," Maggie said. "He'll be fine. Besides, he's just a dog."

"He's not just a dog, mother!" Scully snapped. "That's what I'm trying to tell you! He's my… dog. _My_ dog!"

" _Your_ dog will be fine, Dana," Maggie said slowly, as if she was talking to a child or a mentally challenged person. "Are you okay? Is everything all right?"

"Yes," Scully answered, a little too quickly. "I'm just… nervous about leaving him."

Mulder growled when he heard that.

"That is not what I meant!" Scully snapped again, this time at the dog. "I didn't leave… No, we will not talk about that now. I have to go. Take care of Mrs. Scully and be obedient. I don't want any problems."

"Dana…?" Maggie was getting more and more confused.

"Not now, mom," Scully cut her off. "I really have to go, I don't want to be late. See you in the evening!"

She left before Maggie had a chance to say goodbye. Puzzled, her mother turned to Mulder.

"She is hiding something," Maggie guessed. "Something is wrong. It's her partner, I suppose, you know, the one she named you after? She doesn't want me to worry, but I can feel that something has happened to him."

"Woof," Mulder agreed.

"She called me Mrs. Scully, for God's sake! Who calls her mother that?"

Mulder didn't understand this part, so he didn't bark anything.

"I had a dream last night," Maggie continued. "I dreamed that you were him. Or he was you, something like that…"

"Woof," Mulder agreed.

"He wanted to live with her, but the only way for that to work was if he became a dog," Maggie remembered. "It was like a fairytale. I can't tell that to Dana, she doesn't believe in dreams. I could tell him, though, I think he would understand."

"Woof," Mulder agreed again.

"I don't know, Fox," Maggie sighed. "Maybe he's not perfect for her, but he loves her and she loves him. It would be better than staying alone, for both of them. When I was her age, I already had four children! Dana, on the other hand, only has her job, and that can't last forever."

Mulder got tired of trying to understand her, so he stopped listening. He closed his eyes and drifted to a light sleep, lulled by Maggie's gentle voice and petting.

"She was right about one thing, though," Maggie smiled. "You are a good dog."

When Scully returned from work, she found them in exactly the same position as she left them, curled on the couch together, watching some soap opera.

"Did you spend the whole day in front of TV?" she wondered. Hearing her voice Mulder jumped and rushed to her, so fiercely that he pushed her on the floor.

"Nice of you to notice I'm back," she said in a slightly accusing tone of voice. Apparently, she was still jealous of the connection that he shared exclusively with her mother and she couldn't help to notice that it took him a bit longer to register her return than the day before.

"Oh, no, of course not," Maggie answered her question. "We went to the park, and I even took him to my place. I forgot to take my pills so we went to get them. He was great in the car and we went for a walk around the neighborhood. He met Kelly's Lucy, and they seemed to really like each other! Oh, and I cleaned this place a bit when we got back, I hope you don't mind."

Scully did mind, but she didn't say anything.

"Is he pure breed?" Maggie asked.

"What?" Scully was confused.

"Kelly is thinking about breeding Lucy, and since they really get along she asked me if-"

"No!" Scully cut her off.

"No what?" Maggie inquired. "No, he's not pure, or no, you won't let him mate with Lucy? Because Kelly would pay you for that, of course!"

"No, mom! How can you even suggest that I take money for his union with another woman?"

"Dana?" Maggie was now seriously getting worried for her daughter. "I was talking about your dog, not about your… friend. Kelly is a lesbian, you know that."

Scully briefly closed her eyes and took a deep breath, trying to stop herself from saying something even stupider. She wanted her mother to disappear and if Genia came in that moment Scully would have a hard time stopping herself from wishing just that! True, she would never see her mother again, but she would at least still have her dog. Mulder might have the enjoyable rest of his life as a dog, even if it'd be the shorter one. Scully wasn't sure that she could keep him alive for longer as a human, anyway.

God, what is she thinking about? Weighing pros and cons of making the people closest to her disappear or change shape forever?

This is exactly why you shouldn't grant three wishes to a skeptic who doesn't believe in them!

"What would Mulder wish for?" Scully caught herself thinking. "He would probably ask for peace on Earth."

She chuckled at the thought, forgetting that her mother was watching her, by this point seriously concerned for her sanity. Like a little child, Scully acted as if just because her eyes are closed and she can't see anybody, it means nobody can see her either.

"And his second wish would be to undo the first wish because he's too restless to find peace in peace!"

"Woof," Mulder commented, as if he could hear her thoughts.

"Dana?" Maggie, luckily, couldn't read them.

"I'm sorry mother, I'm just tired," Scully finally pulled herself together. "It's been a long week and I can't think straight at the moment. I need to catch up on sleep, nothing more."

"Okay," Maggie sighed. "I'll let you get some rest. I'll call you tomorrow, okay?"

"Yes, thank you," Scully agreed, leading her to the door.

"Don't worry, Dana," Maggie turned around one last time. "You will find him. You always do. Let me know if there's anything I can do to help."

"I will," Scully promised, closing the door after her. She let out a heavy sigh of relief. It was indeed a rough week, but it was over. She had a whole weekend ahead of her to figure something out. Or not. At least she wouldn't have to leave Mulder alone for the next two days.

"Woof," Mulder tried to get her attention.

"I brought some files," she informed him. "Do you want to check them out with me?"

Mulder tilted his head, looking interested. It brought a smile to her face, but she wondered if he could understand her or if she was just imagining it. They had so many differences, even without him being a dog. How was it possible for someone like her to fall in love with someone like him?

Love? Where did that word come from? Again!

"I'm just tired," Scully reminded herself.

She turned the TV off and took out her files. Mulder jumped on the couch next to her and looked at those over her shoulder.

"UFO sightings?" she sighed, examining the first file. "Not worth my time!"

She put the file away while Mulder whined behind her in protest.

"How about this?" she ignored his displeasure, opening another file. "Virgin pregnancy? Oh, come on! These days anybody can get pregnant but…"

She didn't finish the sentence. She didn't have to. Mulder whined again, this time sadly.

Anybody but _me_.

Anybody but _us_.

"Third time's the charm," she said, forcing the cheerfulness while opening another one.

"Pole dancers are mysteriously disappearing from a night club in Iowa…" she read aloud. Mulder didn't whine this time, but he was definitely paying attention.

"Mulder, you're drooling on me!" Scully accused him, closing the file. He licked her cheek in response.

"Oh, that fixes it. Right!" she feigned feeling offended and Mulder licked her again, broader this time.

"Stop it!" she smiled, and he knew she didn't mean it. The truth is, she rather enjoyed it. She never got to feel his tongue when he was human. She felt basically every other part of him, but his tongue remained a mystery. Now, as a dog, he more than made up for that lapse.

"You are not sleeping in the bed tonight," she informed him, and he didn't object. He obediently stayed on the couch, listening to the sounds of her breathing from the bedroom, and when he was sure that she fell asleep he sneaked inside and quietly jumped on the bed next to her.

Now he too could finally sleep.


	9. Bath and secrets

"Stay put!" Scully warned the soaped dog that was trying to get out of her tub. "If you're going to continue sleeping in my bed, you have to be clean!"

Mulder whined, hiding his tail between his legs. He was miserable. The wet fur was heavy on him and shampoo for dogs smelled terrible. On top of it, his owner had no mercy.

"Come on, this can't be that bad," Scully smiled at his obvious discomfort, which didn't make him feel any better. Humans can be incredibly cruel, but he trusted her, he belonged to her, he depended on her. He had to endure whatever she deemed fit to do with him. Except the hairdryer! He barked loudly when she tried to use that thing on him, not letting her come close.

"Mulder, you're wet, I need to dry you," Scully tried to explain, but he wasn't listening to reason. He growled once, then lowered his head and went on whining, ashamed that he had to raise his voice on her.

"Men!" Scully shook her head in disbelief, not understanding this reaction to a simple hairdryer.

"Dogs!" She shook her head again, giving up. "All right, I'm putting it down. But stay on the floor until your fur dries by itself, I don't want you to wet my furniture. Do you understand?"

Mulder whined, not looking at her. He just wanted to get out of the bathroom and never be taken to the tub again. He wanted to smell like a dead animal's remains, not like whatever this was that Scully washed him with.

Still smiling, Scully opened the bathroom door and Mulder rushed out. He found his little green toy and curled in the corner with it, licking his wet fur and wounded pride.

"Look what I bought for you," Scully tried to gain his attention a few minutes later. He raised his head and gave her a suspicious look. She had something in her hand, but he didn't know what and he wasn't sure he wanted to find out. He whined miserably, pleading for her to finally show some mercy.

"It's just cookies," Scully assured him. "For dogs. Look, they are shaped like little bones. You want one?"

Mulder carefully sniffed the cookie she offered, not sure whether to trust her or if this was some kind of trap.

Scully curiously observed him. She still wasn't sure how much he could understand and how much of her partner was present in this dog. It surely seemed like he could understand a lot, but then again, she'd felt the same for Queequeg, who never was a human. It was time for a little experiment.

"Sit!" She ordered and Mulder complied, getting a cookie.

"Speak!" She told him and he barked, getting another tiny bone.

"Roll over," she went on, and he did as he was told once again. He had no problem understanding her, but dogs can easily learn those commands. She needed to try something harder, and having Mulder on his back gave her a nice view of his private parts, which in turn gave her an idea.

"I decided to have you neutered," she said seriously. "I made an appointment with a vet for Monday."

"Woof!" Mulder jumped, terrified. He run to the kitchen and, finding nowhere else to crawl to, hid under the table. He growled at her when she followed.

"Relax, it was a joke," she tried to assure him, but he didn't let her come close.

Staying on the safe distance, Scully observed her aghast partner in a purely scientific manner. No dog could be neutered more than once, so no dog was supposed to ever understand the meaning of that word. Mulder seemed to understand it very well, so his human mind and memories must have been hidden somewhere inside that cute head. Yet, he had canine body, and dogs can't lie. She had a perfect opportunity to find out anything she wanted, since Mulder would not be able to hide his true feelings.

 _Did you really grab my ass by accident after that meeting, Mulder? Did the New Year's kiss mean anything to you? Why did you hide my ova from me for so long? Did you want that baby, too? Would you be a father to it? What did you_ really _have to do to get me the cure for my cancer? Do you ever think about me instead of watching your tapes? Did that night mean anything? If Diana had lived, would you have called_ her _your touchstone instead of me?_

She was ashamed of her thoughts. She sounded like a jealous bitch even to herself, but that wasn't the worst part of it. No, the worst part was that she actually considered using Mulder's… _disability_ to find out his secrets. As tempting as it sounded, it was immoral and she had no right to torture him like that. Besides, if the answers weren't what she was hoping for, did she really want to know?

No!

Yes…

"I trust you," she whispered and left the kitchen. If she ever gained the courage to ask, she would be asking the man, not a dog. If he ever decided to tell her, it would be by his own free will.

Staying alone in the kitchen, Mulder relaxed a little. He was determined to never leave the cover of the table, but he soon forgot what he was doing there in the first place and got bored, so he went to search for some company. He found his alien and played with it for a bit, then decided it would be more fun if Scully played with him, so he took the toy and went to search for her.

He found her in the living room and she was relieved to see him happy again. Since he was almost dry she allowed him to sit on the couch with her and turned the TV on, looking for something they could watch together. It didn't take long until she found a show about dogs, with explicit scene of two dogs copulating. Mulder froze, dropped his toy and started to drool, not taking his eyes off the TV. Scully giggled, feeling silly and just a little bit naughty.

Not being into the show as much as Mulder, she was the first to notice an intruder. Someone was standing at her living room door, quietly observing them.

"Mulder," Scully gasped, dropping the remote control. He looked at her worriedly, then turned his head in the direction of her gaze.

Genia was back.


	10. Third wish

"Oh my God!" Scully jumped from the couch. Mulder growled at the intruder and stood protectively next to his partner.

"Did you miss me, Agent Scully?" Genia asked with a bored smile.

"Where have you been?" Scully gasped, barely able to breathe. "How did you get inside?"

"Does it matter?" Genia sighed. "I'm here now, so let's get this over with. Are you ready for your last wish? Or did you want more time to think about it?"

"I…" Scully was at loss for words, but only momentarily. "Why are you doing this? Why are you messing with my life?"

"You unrolled me," Genia rolled her eyes impatiently. "It's my job."

"Really? Who hired you? Was it someone from the FBI? Spender? Military?"

"I think I already told you my story."

"Yeah. You did. The problem is, I'm not buying it!"

"Well, I think your dog bought it, all right," Genia nodded towards Mulder, who started to bark angrily in response. Scully placed a hand on his head to quiet him.

"Stay here," she told him. "I'll handle this."

She made a few steps towards Genia, leaving Mulder behind. He sat down obediently, but he kept his gaze on their guest, still quietly growling.

"What did you do to Mulder and how do I get him back?" Scully asked with no-nonsense, deadly serious tone, now standing dangerously close to mysterious woman.

"I took his ability to talk, as you wished," Genia was not the least bit intimidated by this tiny woman who appeared to be trying to stare her to death. "Remember? It was only a few days ago. You can use your last wish to get him back, but it might do you more good to wish for a better memory instead."

"Don't tell me what to wish for!" Scully snapped.

"Fine," Genia rolled her eyes again. "Why don't you tell _me_ , then, so that I can make it happen and be on my way?"

"Because I don't believe in genies," Scully said and she meant it. She really meant it. It was all just a dream, it had to be. She would wake up soon enough, go to work, let Mulder drag her to some God-forgotten place and on the way there tell him all about him being a dog in her dream. Well, maybe not _all_ of it. Some parts could, and should, remain private.

It was a good dream, though. She turned around to meet the dog's gaze, trying to communicate all that to him. She didn't regret a single moment spent with him, no matter his form. Dream or no dream, she wanted him to know that. She also tried to figure out what he wanted. Did he even want to go back to living as human? And if he didn't, could she respect that? Did she have the right to choose for him? As a dog, was he even capable of having an opinion?

They stayed like that, looking at each other, for what seemed like an eternity. Not even Genia interrupted them, though she observed them curiously the whole time.

When Scully finally turned back to her guest, she knew there's was only one thing she could ask for.

"I want him back," she said, defeated. Believing in Genia was one thing, but playing her game was a step too much for a scientist in her. She didn't have a choice, but that didn't make it any easier.

"Are you sure?" Genia asked. "It's your last wish. You could have whatever you want. He's kinda cute, maybe you should keep him."

"No," Scully said. "I'm sure. I wish for Mulder to be human."

There. She said it. Short, clean and precise. With this wish, nothing could go wrong. This time she finally did it right!

"Done," Genia assured her and Scully felt a huge weight being lifted from her shoulders. With a sigh of relief, she turned around, getting face to face with a… human! But not just any human!

It was a tall…

Naked…

Handsome…

Confused…

Woman.


	11. New woman

"Mulder?" Scully gasped, not believing her own eyes.

"Yes, it's me," the naked woman answered. "Am I allowed to talk now?"

"Yeah…" Scully heard herself speaking. It wasn't real. It was nothing but a dream. Bad dream. She would wake up at any moment and this… This… This tall female perfection, this younger version of Teena Mulder with Samantha's long curly hair, this… This will be gone. Forgotten. Never had happened…

The woman looked down on herself, took her breasts in her hands, then looked at Scully again. "Scully… What the hell?!"

"I…" Scully tried to speak, but her voice wasn't working anymore. She wanted to apologize, but had no idea where to start. It was insane. Her brain burned out for a second and all she could think about were those boobs.

He had bigger breasts than she did. Of course he would!

"Scully!" The Mulder woman demanded her attention. Taking a deep breath, Scully finally pulled herself together and turned around, knowing very well that the person responsible for this mess was no longer standing at the door. Genia had disappeared without a trace, just like she appeared earlier.

"It was my last wish," Scully turned back to Mulder, staring at his breasts again. Maybe it was rude, but she didn't have the courage to look him (her) in the eyes.

"No kidding." Mulder was not amused.

"What was I supposed to say?" Scully snapped, feeling desperate. "If I wished for a male human, she would turn you into a little boy. If I specified your age, you would come back black or Asian. If I insisted on your proper race, she would make you disabled! Don't you get it, Mulder? There's no way to win with her! Nothing I asked for would work like it's supposed to!"

"You could've wished to undo your first wish," Mulder suggested.

Scully closed her eyes and pressed her hands to the sides of her head. She was starting to feel dizzy. And stupid. Incredibly stupid.

Stupid, stupid, stupid!

"Why did you wait until now to tell me that?" she accused him (her).

"Because you wished away my ability to speak, remember?" Mulder was getting furious as well. (S)he was a naked female wearing a dog's collar and smelling like a dog's shampoo, all because his partner refused to believe in genies and take the wishes seriously! (S)he should have been the one to unroll Genia, then they wouldn't now be in this mess!

"I think I'm going to be sick," Scully announced and rushed to the bathroom. Left alone, Mulder concentrated his (her) attention on her (his?) breasts. They were not half bad, (s)he concluded contentedly, shifting her (yes, her!) focus on a somewhat lower area. (S)he wondered how to pee with that. Just sit and it comes? While (s)he's down there, how would it feel to…?

The sound of Scully's retching brought the experiment to abrupt end and Mulder hurried to check on her. (S)he found her on her knees, hugging the toilet and catching her breath.

"Are you all right?" (s)he asked.

"Yeah," Scully offered a weak smile. "It's just from the stress…"

"I know. Having a female partner is never easy," Mulder joked, trying to cheer her up. "You get used to it, though."

(S)he crouched next to her and gently moved a strand of hair behind her ear. "What can I do to help?"

"You could get dressed, for a start," Scully suggested, slowly getting up.

"Dress in what?" Mulder wondered. "Do you have anything my size?"

"I have your sweatpants and T-shirt," Scully informed him. "Bedroom dresser, top drawer."

Mulder nodded and went to search for clothes. (S)he found it quickly, but was reluctant to wear it. (S)he didn't have enough… _stuff_ to fill that underwear. There was no bra, and Mulder knew exactly what seeing a braless woman does to men; (s)he didn't want to be seen like that.

Being a woman wasn't as easy as it seemed, especially when you've been a dog for a while.

"Mulder?" Scully followed him, but kept a safe distance. "Stop staring at your breasts and put on the damn shirt."

"This is all too weird," Mulder admitted. "I feel like I should wake up, but I'm not even sleeping."

"I know," Scully nodded, feeling exactly the same. "I'm sorry, Mulder, I can't tell you how much. This is all my fault."

She wasn't able to suppress the tears, so she quickly left the bedroom. Finally managing to apologize didn't make her feel any better. She didn't get her partner back, and she just lost her dog, a dog that was never meant to be, but she grew to love him nonetheless. She loved the man that wasn't a man anymore, a dog that wasn't a real animal, a daughter that wasn't a real child… Was there anything still real in her sorry excuse of a life?

Mulder quickly finished dressing and went after Scully, finding her quietly sobbing on the couch.

"It's not your fault, Scully. It's mine," (s)he said gently. "You wanted to give up your wishes, but I forced you to use them. This all started because I wanted to prove a point and I guess I… did. I don't blame you for anything."

Scully didn't respond, she just started to sob harder. She would have felt better if he yelled at her, if he got mad and furious. This kindness and forgiveness was too much to handle. She didn't deserve it, and while Mulder was often a pain in the ass, he certainly didn't deserve what happened to him.

"We'll get through this," Mulder assured her, sitting next to her. "We always do."

Scully nodded and tried to wipe her tears. If there was a way to fix this, she would find it. She had to. She may have used her last wish, but she still had her work. She still had her partner. She still had herself.

"We will," she smiled, finally meeting the new woman's gaze. Everything else may have been different, but those eyes stayed the same, just as loyal and stubborn as ever. Those eyes were still the source of her strength.

"Besides," Mulder squeezed her hand reassuringly. "It could have been worse."

"How?" Scully wondered.

"You could have wished for your own desk."


	12. Shopping trip

Mulder was sitting with his head buried in his hands, while Scully went to throw up again.

"What is wrong with me?" he thought. "Why can't she spend five minutes with me without getting sick? It wasn't like this when I was a dog."

His shoulders started to shake. It hurt to feel rejected.

"Mulder?" Scully came back. "Are you crying?"

"No," he objected, in between sobs. He got up and moved away, turning his back to Scully. "Leave me alone!"

"Mulder, what's wrong?" Scully didn't obey him, as usual.

"These clothes don't fit," Mulder whined. It was true, and it brought him more tears. He came back to a human form only to find out that nothing fits him anymore, not even the only constant in his life: his partner.

"Okay…" Scully was thinking fast. "Do you want to go shopping?"

"Shopping?" Mulder turned to her, feeling excited, but not knowing why.

"Yes," Scully nodded. "I would lend you some of my clothes, but, as you already noticed, they wouldn't fit you. We can buy you something that would."

"You want to go shopping with me?" Mulder sounded suspicious. "The mere sight of me makes you sick, but you're willing to take me shopping?"

"It's not you what's making me sick," Scully shook her head, feeling amused. She thought she knew her partner well, but she never saw him acting like a woman with PMS before.

"It's not me?!" Mulder snapped, crying again. "Who is it then? Because I don't see anybody else here, Scully! Do you see anybody else? I don't think you do! No, no you don't! It's just the two of us, so it has to be me! You are disgusted by me! Admit it, Scully! You are supposed to be my best friend, my _only_ friend in all this, and you can't! Even! Look! At me!"

Scully just stood there, watching him without throwing up, which was a more powerful gesture than anything she could've said to him at that moment. She wasn't disgusted, she was touched. He never called her his best friend before. She loved him, even now. As a man, dog, or a woman, Mulder was just as cute and loveable, more than she could ever express in words. So she didn't even try. She kept standing there and offered a tissue when it seemed Mulder's breakdown was coming to an end.

"Are you done?" she asked him, just to be sure.

"Yeah," Mulder nodded. "I think so."

"What was that, anyway?" Scully wondered.

"I don't know, Scully," Mulder sniffed. "I'm a woman, I have feelings!"

"You always had feelings, Mulder," Scully smiled fondly.

"Not like this, Scully, I'm telling you, this is insane! Geez!"

"You'll get used to it," Scully assured him, at the same time hoping that he wouldn't have to.

"Do you still want to go shopping with me?" Mulder asked hopefully.

"Yes. Do you?"

"More than I would like to admit," Mulder confessed, which made Scully chuckle. He was already more of a woman than she ever was!

"I'm sure you won't need woman's clothes for long, but there's no reason for you to be uncomfortable until then," Scully reasoned. "Are you ready to go?"

"Um, no," Mulder was hesitant. "I should have a shower first."

"But I just gave you a bath!"

"Yes, that's why. You used shampoo for dogs!" Mulder accused her.

"You were a dog," Scully reminded him.

"I still didn't like it."

"I've noticed that."

"But you didn't stop!"

"You destroyed my plants and raped my pillow. I think we're even."

"Fine!"

"Do you want to use my shampoo this time?"

"Count on it, Scully!"

It took him a while, but taking a shower seriously improved Mulder's mood. Scully could only wonder what else (s)he did in there, but she didn't really want to know. Whatever a man, who just got himself a female body, does to familiarize with said body is nobody's business but his.

They went to a mall. At first it was awkward for Mulder to enter woman's aisles and stores and try on women's clothes, but the more they bought, the more relaxed he felt. Most of his new clothes were casual or business, since Scully snatched away every sexy dress he took from the shelves with the intention of trying it. They got him some make-up and a new haircut, and Mulder was starting to really like the woman that was looking at him from the store mirrors. He just wished that woman was someone else…

"Mulder, high heels are not for you," Scully was trying to explain to him in the shoe store.

"If you can wear them, so can I," he insisted.

"I wear them to be able to reach your belly button! Don't make this harder for me."

"Afraid of a little competition, Scully?"

"Mulder…" Scully sighed in frustration, but she then heard something more frustrating, horrifying even, right behind her.

"Agent Scully?"

"Oh, hi sir," she turned around, coming face to face with her boss. Damn!

"I heard you talking to Mulder," Skinner said. "Where is he?"

"I'm right here!" Mulder told him.

"Excuse me," Skinner turned to him. "Who are you?"

"This is Mulder's cousin," Scully hurried to explain. "Vixen Mulder. You heard me talking to her, sir. Mulder is not back yet."

"Vixen?" Mulder gave her a furious look, to which Scully only shrugged. She had to think fast and that was the first name that came to her mind.

"It's a nice name," Skinner assured him, not taking his eyes off of him. Mulder stared at him, sure that his boss will recognize him at any moment, but that moment just wasn't coming. Skinner gazed at him like he never did before and it gave Mulder chills.

"Walter Skinner," Skinner offered his hand. "It's nice to meet you, Vixen."

"You too, sir," Mulder accepted the hand, hesitating a lot.

"Call me Walter," Skinner smiled. Mulder gave Scully a panic look, silently begging for help.

"I'm sorry, sir, but we're in a hurry," Scully pulled her partner away from their boss, just as eager to leave as Mulder was.

"That was weird," Mulder noticed when they reached a safe distance.

"Tell me about it," Scully agreed. "Let's just forget the high heels and get out of here."

"Okay."

"Do you want to go home or back to my place?"

"I just want to go home. Do some research, you know."

Scully didn't know what kind of research, but she didn't ask. She didn't want to know.

They walked in silence for a while, when Mulder suddenly asked: "Do you know what else is weird, Scully?"

"What?"

"You trying to reach my navel."

"Drop it, Mulder."

"No, I'm serious. What the hell do you want to do with my belly button?"


	13. Adjusting

Mulder was sitting on his couch, alone, exhausted and… female.

After a long day, he was facing a long night as well, with no answers and no solutions. Right now his main problem wasn't how to get back his male body, but how to function in this female one. He wasn't even sure he wanted to go back. He wasn't a man trapped in female body, he was a woman who used to be man, but wasn't anymore. Women generally didn't want to be men, and Mulder was no exception. He could remember being a man, but he couldn't feel it anymore. It was like remembering a past life or first kiss, something that surely had happened, but it doesn't have any active impact on your current situation.

The unfamiliar hormones were driving him crazy. Being a woman was hard; not that being a man was any easier, but at least he was used to that. This was something new and he didn't know how to even start adjusting to it. Shopping helped in a way that he felt much more comfortable in clothes that were designed for his current shape, but that was only on the outside.

Inside, he was facing a storm. His thoughts were a loud gibberish, jumping from one subject to another, and his attempts to catch them and focus on just one were in vain. His feelings seemed to have a will of their own, just using him as a vessel in their confusing dance.

He was tense and irritable, for no apparent reason. He wanted to laugh and cry at the same time. Everything was so intense that he didn't know if he could survive it.

"You'll get used to it," Scully had told him. He could only hope she was right. After all, she had a lot more experience with female-ing than he did.

Scully had driven him to his place and hugged him goodbye, but it was a tense hug, as if she was doing it for the first time, or to prove that she was still able to touch him without getting sick.

"Call me if you need anything," she had told him, placing a chocolate bar in his purse. "If you are one of those rare, lucky bitches who don't like chocolate, save it for when I come to visit you."

As it turned out, he wasn't a "rare, lucky bitch" - he ate the whole damn thing! It calmed him down, just a bit, but enough to come up with some kind of a plan. He had promised Scully he would work on figuring out a way to undo her wishes, but he had a bigger problem at hand: hairy legs. Scully had said it doesn't matter, but he never saw _her_ legs looking like that! He took his razor, got into the tub and went to work. The result pleased him so much that he didn't stop with legs; he bravely started to clear the way in between them. It was a perfect opportunity to finally learn exactly what is where and how certain activities feel. He remembered that one never-to-be-mentioned-again night with Scully, but he didn't think about what he did to her, focusing instead on how it would feel if someone did the same to _him_. The _male_ someone. His sex may have changed, but his orientation remained heterosexual.

All in all, he spent a hell of a lot time in the bathroom, finally getting out feeling cleaner and dirtier at the same time.

He went back to the couch and turned the television on, not knowing what to watch. Sport suddenly sounded boring and the mere idea of his tapes disgusted him. He settled on a romantic movie, crying at the predictable and not-sad-at-all end. It made him wonder if something was wrong with him. Not all women acted that irrationally, did they?

Speaking of irrational, how come he never noticed before how much of a mess his place was? How did he manage to live like that? What kind of a man he used to be? What kind of a woman was he supposed to be now? Could he be like Scully? He couldn't come up with a better role model than Scully, when it came to being female or anything else, really. Surely, she had flaws, but he wouldn't change even that about her.

He started to clean up a bit, but soon learned he wasn't a natural at that. It made him feel hopeful, at least some things about him didn't change. He was getting hungry, but couldn't find anything eatable in the fridge. Pizza used to be his usual choice, but this time he craved something healthier. More than that, he craved company. He picked up the phone and started to dial Scully's number, but changed his mind. She spent most of the week taking care of him, and she deserved a little break and time for herself. It wouldn't be fair to deny her that.

No, he would call someone else. But who? He had no friends. Okay, _he_ did, but the new _she_ didn't. Nobody but Scully knew _her_.

He didn't want to go to a restaurant alone and he didn't want to hang out with strangers. He didn't want to bother Scully, but he started to type her number again because she was the only one…

No.

She wasn't.

There was someone else.

Another friend.

A big, bald, beautiful man who told him to call him Walter.

Mulder quickly dialed the number, before his unpredictable female brain could change his mind. Skinner must have figured out by now who he really was and he might have available resources to help him. He will yell at him, scold him, and somehow blame this all on him, even though it was technically Scully's fault, but he will help him in the end. He always does.

"Skinner," the familiar voice answered the phone.

"Hi sir, um, it's Mulder."

There was a moment of silence before Skinner reacted. "Vixen?"

"Yeah, Vixen," Mulder rolled his eyes. _Damn it, Scully! Why couldn't you come up with a normal name, like BJ, or, I don't know, Denise? You know how much I hate my real name, but it didn't stop you from giving me the female version of it!_

"How, um, how did you get my number?" Skinner wondered. Good question.

"Scully gave it to me," Mulder answered. _Take that, my creative partner! If this conversation, or even potential meeting, goes wrong, Skinner will have_ you _to blame!_

"Oh, what a coincidence."

"What do you mean, sir?"

"Nothing, I just… I wanted to ask her for your number."

Shit! This wasn't going as Mulder had planned. Skinner obviously hadn't figured out anything, instead he… This was awkward as hell.

"Why is that, sir?" Mulder asked carefully.

"Call me Walter," Skinner insisted.

"Walter," Mulder repeated. "What did you want my number for?"

"I was just wondering if you would like to have dinner with me sometimes."

Holly…! Mulder took a deep breath, his heart racing. Was Skinner asking him on a date? This was insane! Hang up, Mulder! Fox, Vixen, whoever you are, just hang up the damn phone!

"Tonight?" Mulder heard himself asking, instead of hanging up. To hell with everything! He didn't want to be alone tonight, and Skinner was… attractive.

No! No, no, no! Skinner was a friend! A gentleman! Besides, nothing needs to happen on a first date, right?

"Well, I wasn't about to suggest tonight, but if you are available…" Skinner hesitated, though not for long. "If you are available, so am I."

"I am," Mulder heard his crazy female brain talking.

The same brain agreed with "Walter" on time and place, but that wasn't enough. Shrewd brain calculated that he had just enough time to buy that lingerie that Scully hadn't approved of.

This female brain didn't need another female's permission to start living fully and unapologetically.


	14. Skinner

Skinner was standing in front of the door numbered 42, his fist in the air. He was about to knock on Mulder's door and it creeped him out. What if Mulder himself opened the door? What if he came back and he didn't approve of his cousin going out with his boss?

A part of him wanted to turn around and leave, but he couldn't do that to Vixen. She was expecting him. More than that, she called him, not the other way around.

Vixen. There was something about her that Skinner couldn't quite point out. They say when you meet your soul mate you feel like you've known her forever. Skinner didn't believe in soul mates, of course. There wasn't much space for cheesy romance in his life. But this Vixen… When he looked into her eyes for the first time, when he heard her speak… He was sure, damn sure that he knew her. He was just as certain that he had never met her before. He didn't even know that Mulder had living relatives, and he would definitely remember that unusual name.

Vixen. Intoxicating.

Maybe it was just a mid-life crisis, maybe he was just imagining it, being alone for so long. Either way, he had to find out.

His fist finally met the door.

"Just a second," he heard from the inside.

The second lasted forever. Skinner noticed his palms were sweating so he wiped them on his pants. God, how will he be able to offer a hand to this woman? What will she think of him?

The door finally opened and Vixen stared at him with a strange smile. It almost looked like she was making fun of him, but he didn't pay much attention to that, marveling in her beauty instead.

"You look great, Vixen," he admitted.

"Thank you, sir. So do you," Vixen responded. Maybe it was just Skinner's imagination, but she sounded just as nervous as he felt. Could that mean she liked him?

"Are you ready to go?" he asked her, offering his arm, but Vixen just rushed past him to the elevator, ignoring the gesture. Skinner didn't complain, it gave him a nice view of her butt, and what a lovely butt it was!

After an awkward, but quick ride in the elevator, Vixen rushed straight to his car and waited by the passenger's door. How did she know which car was his? It couldn't be a coincidence, could it? What then? Fate? But Skinner didn't believe in fate. Was it time for him to expand his beliefs?

He dropped his keys twice before he managed to unlock the car doors.

"Are you comfortable, Vixen?" he asked his date when she settled in her seat.

"Yes," she shifted, not looking comfortable at all. "Thank you, sir."

"Please," Skinner insisted. "Call me Walter."

"Okay," Vixen agreed. "But only if you call me Mulder."

"I'd rather not, if that's ok with you," Skinner admitted, starting the car.

"Why is that, Walter?" Vixen wondered.

"I… That's how I call your cousin and… I don't want to think about him while I'm with you."

"Why is that, sir?" Vixen sounded genuinely interested. "Sorry, _Walter_."

"I don't like to bring my agents on my dates, that's all," Skinner shrugged.

"Do I remind you of him?" Vixen wondered.

"No, not at all," Skinner assured her. "You are nothing like your cousin."

"Oh," she sounded disappointed. "You don't like him much, do you?"

For some reason, that question made Skinner chuckle. It was a warm chuckle, and it surprised him just as much as it surprised her.

"I like him more than I should," he admitted.

"You do?" Vixen sounded like she was on a brink of tears. Damn, did he say something wrong?

"He gives me lots of headaches, that cousin of yours," he couldn't help but smile. "But he's a good guy, loyal, brave… His heart is always in the right place."

"Thank you, sir," Vixen whispered through tears. She placed her hand on his leg and gently squeezed it, so gently in fact that he almost lost control of the car and crushed them in the nearby tree.

"Are you all right?" Skinner asked worriedly after he gained back control.

"Yes," she nodded, retrieving her hand. "It's just…"

"It's your father, isn't it?" Skinner said gently.

"My father?"

"Mulder's uncle who recently died," Skinner clarified. "He was your father, wasn't he?"

"Um," Vixen sounded confused. "Yes, I suppose he was."

"You suppose?"

"Well… My mother wasn't sure who impregnated her, but yes, he raised me as his own."

"That's weird," Skinner was a little suspicious now. "Scully said he didn't have any children."

"I suppose my cousin didn't tell her. Our fathers didn't speak to each other, so him and I fell out of touch as well."

"I'm sorry."

"No, it's fine. We, um, we are catching up."

"So why did you come here without him?"

"There is a lot of stuff to take care of after someone dies unexpectedly, so he stayed to take care of it. I… It was too hard for me to deal with it, so he suggested I take a vacation and kindly offered his place."

"He thought you'd be better all alone here?"

"I'm not alone, Walter," Vixen murmured. "I have Scully. My cousin called her and asked her to take care of me. And… She did."

"Well," Skinner was seriously embarrassed for letting his feelings show, but he had to say it. "Now you have me, as well."

Vixen was touched. She must have been, since she accepted his arm when they arrived to the restaurant.

After they were seated Skinner started to study her face, in order to keep his eyes away from her breasts. He was trying hard to remain a gentleman, especially with this remarkable woman. She wasn't wearing any make up, probably due to her grief. Her eyes were shining with tears and she looked so lost and confused, like she was left all alone in the world. She must have loved her father very much. Skinner wanted to make it better for her, but he didn't know how. He hoped a nice meal was a good start in that direction.

It was a pleasure to watch Vixen eat. She ordered real food, not some low fat salad, and even went for a huge dessert. Skinner was already full while she seemed to only have started. What a woman!

"Do you want to go for a walk?" Skinner boldly asked her after he paid the bill. "The night is pleasant and I could burn off some of these calories."

"Sure," Vixen agreed and Skinner's heart leapt. He offered his arm again and this time she took it without even a hint of hesitation. She seemed to be so comfortable with him already. It pleased him. He couldn't help but hope for many more nights like this one. And maybe, just maybe, one day instead of insisting on being called Mulder she would choose Skinner as her last name…

"It's been a long time since I went on a date," Skinner admitted. "I forgot how nice it can be."

"I know what you mean," Vixen nodded. "It's been a long time for me, too."

"I hope..." Skinner hesitated. "I was wondering if you'd like to do this again sometime…"

"I…" Vixen suddenly pulled away from him. "I need to think. This is going too fast and I…"

"You feel it, too, don't you?" Skinner whispered, taking her hand that she immediately pulled away. He leaned into her personal space so close that he could feel her breath.

"I would like to go home now," Vixen turned her head away, taking a step back.

"Vixen, what's wrong?" Skinner was confused. "Talk to me, please."

"Please take me home," was all that Vixen managed to say.

"Of course," Skinner sighed. He assumed he pushed her too far too soon and he scolded himself for it. She just lost her father, of course she wouldn't be ready for this!

They drove in silence and he walked her to the front door of the building in silence.

"I would invite you upstairs, but I don't know if my cousin would approve," Vixen told him, avoiding his gaze.

"I understand," Skinner said, trying hard not to show his disappointment. He felt he made a true connection with this woman earlier, but now it was all falling apart, and he didn't have an explanation for any of it. The last thing he wanted, and the only right thing to do was to walk away from her and let her figure it out for herself. He would call her tomorrow, maybe she'd change her mind by then and they could try again soon…

He turned sharply, determined to reach his car in a record time, but her gentle voice stopped him.

"Walter…" she called him.

He turned away and just looked at her, afraid of saying anything at all, in case it turned out to be a wrong thing.

"I did have a good time," she said, looking him in the eyes again. "Thank you."

"I'm glad," he responded earnestly, unable to move. Vixen approached him, standing so close to him that he could touch her, so he did, unable to resist. His hand went to her cheek, stroking it gently, and she didn't pull away. They gazed at each other for what seemed like forever and their faces seemed to be coming closer to each other, but he had no idea which one of them was making the move. It was so intense that Skinner finally had to close his eyes. At the same moment Vixen's hand went to the back of his neck and she pulled him closer, closing the tiny gap between them.

Their lips met, causing them both to shiver. They opened up for each other, their tongues meeting and tasting each other for the first time. For a brief moment Vixen pulled him even closer, before pushing him away.

"I have to go," she gasped, breathing fast. She turned around and disappeared into the building.

Skinner closed his eyes again for a moment, then he smiled and went back to his car. The huge grin stayed on his face for the whole ride back home.


	15. Nightly visit

Scully was sleeping soundly when the phone rang. She turned towards the night stand and picked it up without fully opening her eyes.

"Mulder?" she answered, knowing very well who was calling. "What's wrong?"

"I…" Mulder hesitated. "I need your help."

"Can't this wait until morning?" Scully sighed. She wasn't eager to leave her bed.

"No, it can't," Mulder was determined.

"Do you know what time it is?" she didn't know either, but that was the whole point. She didn't want to know, not the time nor his problem, she just wanted to sleep.

"Scully…" Mulder pleaded. "I think… I think I got my period."

"What?!" she sat up straight, suddenly fully awake and alert.

"Well, it's either that or I'm dying," he sounded miserable.

"You are not dying," Scully assured him. "I'll be right there."

She was already up, putting her clothes on. Working with Mulder taught her how to get dressed in no time. In just a few minutes she was ready to go, together with a pack of tampons. She wasn't sure if giving tampons to a man was wise decision, even if he had a woman's mind and body. She was sure it would freak him out, but she didn't have any pads. Could he survive long enough for her to make a quick detour and buy him some? She decided that he could.

When she arrived at his place he didn't open the door so she used her keys to get inside. The lights weren't on and there were no sounds. It came to her mind that she forgot to ask him where he was, she just assumed he would be at home, where she left him, but with Mulder it was never a safe assumption.

"Mulder?" she called, not knowing whether to be annoyed or worried.

"In here," she heard a female voice from the bathroom. She followed the voice and it led her to a silhouette sitting on the toilet – the lights were off even in there.

"Why is it so dark in here?" she asked. Her hand was already on the light switch, but she took a few seconds to brace herself before pressing it. She wasn't sure she wanted to see whatever it was that she was about to see.

"You sound like your sister," Mulder answered.

"My sister is dead, Mulder," Scully reminded him.

"Yeah, I know," he sighed. "So is mine."

She pressed the switch and Mulder squinted as the bright light filled the room. He seemed fine otherwise and Scully was relieved. She tried not to pay attention to bloody underwear on the floor. It was a normal part of life, she reasoned. If Emily had lived, one day she would have had to do this with her. She never imagined doing it with Mulder though, but then again, she had done much weirder things with him. Or just as weird, at least.

"Take a clean underwear and put this on," she instructed him with her doctor's voice, offering a packet of pads.

"Thanks," he took it without looking at her, for which she was grateful.

"I'll make you some tea," she blurted the first excuse that came to her mind and quickly left the bathroom. Tea was a good idea, and she needed it maybe even more than him. She searched for cookies to serve them with tea, but didn't find any. Then again, maybe a nice, warm drink wasn't strong enough for what they needed and she decided to dump it in the sink. When Mulder emerged from the bathroom she handed him a bottle of beer instead.

"Is this going to stain?" he asked her, unsure about sitting on his couch.

"It shouldn't," Scully shrugged. "It might, though."

"Oh," he took a big sip of the beer, but remained standing.

"Sit down, please," Scully invited him. "It's going to be okay."

"Fine," he reluctantly agreed, not looking comfortable at all. "How often do I have to change this thing?"

"Every few hours or so. The whole thing only lasts for about four days."

"Only?"

"Are you in pain?"

"A little, yes."

"I can give you something for that."

"No, it's fine. I like the pain, it keeps me from thinking too much."

"Mulder, we'll get you out of this, I promise."

"How?"

"I don't know, but there's got to be a way. I don't think we can do it alone, though. It's time to ask for help."

"Who?"

"I think Skinner is our best shot."

"No!" Mulder almost screamed. "You can't tell Skinner! Anybody but him!"

"Why not?" Scully was surprised. She didn't want to involve Skinner either, but she didn't feel like they had much of a choice.

"He can't know who I am," Mulder pleaded. "It would crush him."

"I think you are exaggerating a little, Mulder. Skinner is used to our failures. He won't be pleased, but he may be able to help us."

"No, you don't understand, Scully!" Mulder insisted. "He would never forgive me!"

"This isn't your fault, Mulder."

"No, not this!"

"What then?"

"You won't forgive me either," he sighed miserably. He was going to have to tell her, there was no way out now, but he was afraid of her wrath.

"Mulder?" Scully was getting suspicious now. "What did you do?"

"I already called him," he finally admitted.

"You called Skinner? When?"

"Yesterday. I felt lonely and… I thought he might be able to help, as you said."

"Did you tell him?"

"No, I couldn't!"

"Why not?"

"Because he… He had no clue. And he really likes me, you know, the way I am… at the moment…"

"Mulder, what the hell are you talking about?"

"I kissed him. We went on a date and I kissed him."

There. He said it. Let the doomsday begin!

"Oh for God's sake!" Scully stood up and went to the window, desperately needing fresh air. She tried to open it, but her hands started to shake so she gave up. Mulder noticed her body trembling and thought she was crying.

"Scully," he stood up, wanting to approach her, when she abruptly turned around and raised her hand to stop him.

She wasn't crying; she was laughing. It looked more like a hysterical laugh than a happy one, so it didn't lessen Mulder's worry for her. Damn! Why couldn't he give her at least one night to rest? Why the hell did he have to start menstruating so soon?

"I'm sorry," he said, standing there miserably. Scully's mental state wasn't the only thing that bothered him, though. He stole a quick glance at the couch, relieved not to find any stains of blood on it. Then again, the couch was black, so would he even be able to see them? He leaned to inspect it closer, but it seemed to be clean. What about his pad? Was it still in place? He briefly touched his pants to make sure of it, which made Scully laugh harder.

"Please don't ever do that in public," she advised him, catching her breath.

"I'm not used to being a woman," Mulder shrugged, carefully sitting down again. "How do you deal with all that blood every month?"

"I don't," Scully whispered. She joined him on the couch and they just sat quietly for a while, each lost in their own thoughts. She was weighing how much to tell him, and he was afraid to ask.

"I stopped having periods after my abduction," she finally said. "I had tests, of course, but my doctors weren't able to find the cause. The only diagnosis I got was… Infertility."

"I'm sorry," Mulder sighed. He didn't know what else to say. It wasn't news for him. They'd been through it before, they'd been through so much more because of it.

"Mulder, it came back," Scully continued through tears. "A few months ago I started menstruating again. At first I was afraid that something was wrong, another cancer maybe, but it turned out to be a perfectly normal period. A month later it came again, then again… Everything was normal, so I thought, maybe…"

"Are you saying your fertility may have been restored?"

"Dr. Parenti thought it was worth trying. He suggested we redo the tests after my next period."

"It was bad news, wasn't it?" Mulder guessed, based on her tears and devastating sadness in her voice.

"There were no tests," her voice was flooding with defeat. "The next period never came."

"It will come," Mulder tried to comfort her. If even he got a period, then truly anything was possible. "Don't give up hope."

"It's been more than a month now," Scully shook her head. "That's too long. I can't afford to hope."

"Then leave the hope to me," Mulder smiled gently. "It will all work out; I can feel it. Just trust me on this."

"How do you know?"

"Woman's intuition," Mulder shrugged and they both smiled.

"You are one hell of a woman, Mulder," Scully laughed, wiping the tears. Mulder pulled her into an embrace and she leaned into it gratefully. It wasn't the body she knew and loved, but it was warm and safe just as much. It reminded her of Melissa, her sister and friend, her angel in heaven.

"I kissed him too," she suddenly said, without thinking. She never told that to anybody before. It was her naughty little secret.

"Who?" Mulder didn't get it, his thoughts still dealing with the fascinations of the menstrual cycle. Scully pulled away to be able to look him in the eyes, curious about his reaction.

"Skinner," she said, barely suppressing a smile.

"You kissed Skinner?" Mulder repeated, unable to process that piece of information. It didn't sound like Scully at all.

"Why are you so surprised?" Scully chuckled. "Did your woman's intuition fail to mention it to you?"

"I…" he looked embarrassed now. "I'm sorry, I had no idea. If I knew I would've never-"

"Mulder, do you think I'm dating him?" Scully interrupted him. "Is that what you are trying to say?"

"No! I mean, yes. I mean, are you?"

"Damn it, Mulder!" Scully snapped. He should've known her better than that. "Do you think I would ever sleep with you if I was involved with Skinner?"

"No," Mulder said slowly and calmly, but he was just as furious as she was. "But then again, I didn't think you'd walk away afterwards and pretend it never happened."

"I…" Scully opened her mouth, but quickly closed it again. She already said too much and there was no way to take it back. "I'm going home," she decided. She was almost at the door when Mulder's voice stopped her.

"So you're just walking away on me again?" he followed her. "Just like that?"

"What else do you want me to do?" she turned to him, engaging them in a staring contest.

"How about you tell _me_ what to do?" Mulder raised his voice. "I am _your_ creation, Scully! _Your_ wish! I have no life, no job, no id or social security number! I have nothing but you, and you don't even want me! You want _him_! I am a woman with no right to exist! How do you think that makes me feel?"

"Mulder," Scully was bracing herself for a question that she was afraid to hear the answer to. "Do you even want to be a man again?"

"I don't know, Scully," Mulder was miserable now, his anger vanishing as fast as it came. "I am a woman and the idea of being a man sounds so strange to me. It sounds so wrong. I don't want to be a man, but I don't want to be a dog either. And when I was a dog, I didn't want to be human. When I was a man, I didn't want to be a woman, or a dog for that matter. So how do I know what I really want, when who I am is not who I really am? My God, Scully, what are we going to do?"

Mulder's monologue ended the staring contest and started the hand holding session. Scully took each of his hands in one of hers and squeezed them reassuringly.

"Lone Gunmen," she informed him.

"What about them?" Mulder was confused.

"We'll go to them," Scully clarified. "Maybe they can figure something out. In any case, they are the only people I can think of who might actually believe us."

"All right," Mulder agreed. "First thing in the morning."

"No. Right now."

"Okay," Mulder shrugged, but neither of them moved. They stood there in silence for a few moments, restoring each other's strength and courage to deal with whatever the fate had in store for them next.

"I need to know one more thing, Mulder," Scully was first to speak again. "Why did you kiss Skinner?"

"I've thought about that, Scully. I honestly can't say."


	16. Lone Gunmen

"Who is it?" Byers asked, while Frohike was unlocking their extensive security system.

"It's Scully," Frohike sounded excited. "With a woman!"

"A woman?" Langley and Byers simultaneously raised their heads from computer screens. "What woman?"

"I don't know," Frohike shrugged. "But she's hot!"

The door finally opened and two ladies stepped inside.

"Hello, Frohike," the hot woman greeted the short man, causing his mouth to widely open and stay that way while she nodded at the rest of the team. "Byers. Langley."

"She knows our names," Byers sounded suspicious.

"Yeah," Langley, on the other hand, seemed impressed. "We are finally getting famous! We have a fan!"

"And it's a girl," Scully smiled, which made the other woman chuckle and look at the floor shyly, or at least pretending to be shy. "Do you guys ever sleep?" Scully wondered.

"Not during the night," Langley shrugged.

"We were just about to," Byers added. "The sun is almost up."

"Close your mouth," the woman said to Frohike, but it only made him gape wider. "It's me, Mulder!"

Langley and Byres looked at each other, then started to laugh, while Frohike continued staring, his jaw almost hitting the floor by this point.

"Good one, Scully!" Byers said.

"Yeah," Langley agreed. "I didn't take you for a practical joker, but you are a pro! You should have saved it for April, though."

"It's not a joke," Scully sighed. "She's telling the truth. Mulder and I found Genia and she turned him into a woman. I need your help to get him back."

"Genia?" Langley was confused.

"Female genie," Scully clarified. "She granted me three wishes and I… Well, I screwed up."

Byers and Langley gave each other another look and went on laughing. The strange woman and Frohike just stared at each other without words.

"Seriously, Scully," Byers said. "Who is she?"

"She's telling the truth," Frohike's ability to speak returned, but his eyes stayed locked with the woman's. "It's him. Come, take a look!"

Langley and Byres weren't buying it, but the opportunity to stare at an attractive woman is not something that happened every day, so they didn't object. In a second all three men surrounded the woman, staring at her eyes for signs of recognition and occasionally stealing a few glimpses at her breasts for… unspecified purposes.

Then the inquisition started.

"How old are you?"

"When did we meet?"

"Which tape did I lend you?"

"What was the name of the movie we went to see two weeks ago?"

And so on. Mulder answered all of them correctly, but the Gunmen just kept going, getting more personal and bizarre.

"How old were you when you lost your virginity?"

"I never told you that!"

"You could tell me now."

"How old will you be when you lose it, Langly?"

"Good one, Mulder!"

"Yeah, good one, but I asked you first!"

"It's none of your business!"

"Are you and Scully doing the wild thing?"

"Haven't you heard what I just said?"

"Scully is right here," Scully interrupted, reminding them of her presence. "Besides, it might be a better idea to ask him that when he's a man again."

Was she trying to give Mulder a reason to give up being a woman? Did she just want to see the Lone Gunmen's shocked faces? Why did she say that, really? She didn't know, it just felt like the thing to do.

They stared at her for a second, but the Mulder woman was more fascinating so they soon turned back to her.

"Are those real?" Frohike asked, trying to grab her breasts.

"Hey!" Mulder objected. "Keep your nasty hands away from me, you filthy man! Of course they are real!"

"How do you know?"

"It's ALL real! I checked!"

"Even… You know? Down there?"

"Are you a virgin?"

"Well, I haven't checked _that_."

"Why not?"

"I don't know how!"

"I could help you with that."

"For God's sake, Frohike, please stop talking!"

"Or what? Are you threatening me, Mulder? You don't have the balls!"

"Funny, Frohike, but you may want to be careful or you could lose yours as well!"

"Is that a purse? What do you have in there?"

"Hey! Langly, give that back!"

After a short struggle the purse ended on the floor, spilling its contents. It caused the men to freeze in place from a sheer horror, while Mulder crouched down, picking up his pads and clean underwear.

"It's mine," Scully tried to spare him further embarrassment, but Mulder just shook his head and stood up, proudly holding his purse.

"No, it's mine," he said, looking at Gunmen, but none of them dared to return his gaze. "Yes, I'm menstruating! Are you happy now? It means I don't have PMS anymore, but I'm still a woman, so back off!"

All the boys immediately moved away, as far away from Mulder as possible. Women in general scared them, but an angry woman yelling about… "female stuff" was more than horrifying.

"Good," Mulder was pleased with his power. "Now excuse me, I need the bathroom. Come with me, Scully."

"Mulder, you can do that by yourself," Scully hesitated.

"Jesus, Scully, I just need to ask you something! In private."

Reluctantly, Scully followed him and Lone Gunmen finally dared to breathe again.

"Wow, that was something!"

"I can't believe he's a woman!"

"Crazy, right?"

"And hot!"

"Frohike!"

"What? He _is_ hot! Lucky bastard!"

Meanwhile, in the bathroom, Mulder sat on the floor and started to laugh his heart out.

"Are you okay, Mulder?" Scully looked a little worried.

"Yeah. Oh God, have you seen their faces?"

Scully had to admit, Gunmen's faces were truly hilarious while they watched Mulder picking up pads, which was funny on its own, if you looked at it that way. She joined Mulder on the floor and they laughed together, trying so hard to suppress it that they almost started to cry.

When they returned to the main room, Lone Gunmen were already deep in research, trying hard not to discuss their thoughts about what was going on between two women in their bathroom.

"Anything?" Scully asked them.

"Well, there's not really much information about genies anywhere," Byres informed her. "Except…"

"In fairytales," Langley finished the thought.

"And wishes never work as they are supposed to," Frohike said next. "The only way to undo them seems to be with another wish."

"So," Byers got the word again. "How many wishes do you have left?"

"This…" Scully sighed, pointing towards Mulder. "This was my last one."

"Oh Scully," Byers didn't sound hopeful.

"What were your first two wishes, then?" Frohike was curious.

"You don't want to know," Mulder answered and nobody insisted.

The men went back to work and Scully returned to the bathroom. She was feeling sick again, just like the previous morning, but she hoped Mulder wouldn't notice. She didn't want him to blame himself again.

"How about we find Genia again?" Mulder suggested. "That way we would be granted another three wishes, wouldn't we?"

"I don't think it works that way," Langley answered without looking at him. None of the man seemed to want to look at him again. Mulder felt a bit hurt, but it was better than them staring at his breasts earlier and invading his personal space in such a Neanderthal way.

"You can only be granted wishes once," Frohike agreed.

"So? Only Scully used them," Mulder pointed out. "I didn't!"

"And what would you do with them?" Langley bravely looked in his direction, though still avoiding the eyes. "Turn her into a man and live happily ever after?"

"I have a better idea," Frohike proposed. "Forget genies and wishes, stay a woman, marry me and we can live happily ever after just as well."

"Now that would be some fairytale!" Mulder joked, and they all laughed, the tension between them finally lessening. So what if he was a woman, they were still old friends.

The morning passed quickly and no one noticed that Scully went to the bathroom a few more times and came back looking pale and drained. However, they all noticed when Mulder went to the same place and came back looking like he was wearing diapers, but nobody commented anything. They analyzed all appearances of Genia that they managed to find out about, and tried to predict where she could be hiding next. Shops? Storages? Private properties? Carpets suddenly seemed to be hiding everywhere!

They ordered pizzas and kept working even during lunch. By the late afternoon they had their search narrowed down to about hundred and seventy locations, none of them completely sure why any of those places was picked in the first place. Nobody knew the odds for even one of them turning out to be of any use, but it was a start.

Scully was relieved. Though it was a long shot, at least now there was something she could do, and she had to do it fast before Mulder came to the idea of exploring his female charms further. If he decided to kiss Frohike as well, she would have to move to Antarctica and spend the rest of her life in faraway isolation, trying to forget that sight. It took him less than a day to go after Skinner, ruining their chances of using FBI's resources. But on the bright side, his trouble-causing skills were left intact by the spell.

They left in the evening, each lost in their own thoughts and too exhausted to talk on the way home. Scully worried about facing Skinner in the morning, and Mulder worried about being prohibited by Scully to see or talk to Skinner.

He couldn't get him out of his mind. He never kissed a man before, especially not as a woman. It was a completely new and exciting experience. He wanted to explore the relationship further, but even if Scully allowed him he just wouldn't dare. Why was she so against it, anyway? She seemed to be jealous and it saddened him. Scully clearly had feelings for Skinner, which meant Mulder could never have him, not even if she found somebody else. He didn't want to be a woman anymore, not if being a woman meant having a crush at your best friend's boyfriend.

He didn't want to be a man again, either, as it wouldn't make seeing Scully with Skinner any easier, but for a whole different reason. It was one thing thinking that she walked away because she wasn't ready for what happened between them, but knowing that she wanted their boss the whole time would be devastating. He wasn't ready to go through that.

Woman or man, it was both ruined for him.

He just wanted to be a dog.


	17. Vixen's theory

"Scully, it's me."

Mulder. Of course. Scully was just about to draw a bath and call it a night when the phone rang. Now, after hearing Mulder's voice, she was sure she could forget about it. She had a feeling it wouldn't be a short call, and it certainly wasn't a necessary one. They already exchanged all the information and the search was over for the day, with no news about Genia's whereabouts.

Having the day spent explaining to Skinner why Vixen wouldn't return his calls, and to her mother what happened to the dog didn't help with brightening her mood. She highly doubted that Mulder's problems would offer any improvement.

"What's wrong?" she sighed.

"I need your help," Mulder whined. The role of damsel in distress suited him just fine, but Scully was getting tired of playing his hero. She took a deep breath, bracing herself for another female emergency. What could it be this time? Did he break a nail? Does his ass look fat?

"My, um, tapes," Mulder hesitated. "They don't work."

"Your tapes?" Scully was confused. "Do I look like a tape repairer to you, miss?"

"They are not broken or anything," Mulder sounded embarrassed, but kept talking nonetheless. "They just… don't work."

"I'm not in the mood for word games, Mulder," Scully was still clueless and slightly irritated. Maybe having him as a dog wasn't such a bad idea, after all.

"They are working just fine," it was Mulder's turn to sigh. "I just don't… enjoy them… the way I used to."

"Oh for God's sake, you can't be serious!" Scully finally got it and she wasn't amused.

"I am," Mulder insisted. "It's tasteless. Disgusting. Boring even."

"Okay, I get the picture!" Scully rolled her eyes, wishing he could see it. "What do you expect me to do about it? I guess they are made for men, and you are not a man. At the moment, I mean," she clarified.

"Right. Let me check. Nope, still a bloody hole down there!"

"Bloody hole?" Was this a joke to him?

"Um, how would you call it?" Mulder chuckled. "Anyway, what should I do instead?"

"Instead?"

"Yeah. What works for you, Scully?"

"You did NOT just ask me that!" Scully was on the verge of hanging up, but she knew better than to think it would free her from him. He would just call again, and if she didn't answer he would be at her door soon. Mulder didn't take No for an answer.

"Come on, Scully, help me out here! I'm bored and I can't think of anything to do. I can't go to my office, I can't watch my tapes, I already spent an hour jogging but all this blood is giving me more energy than I know how to burn. And you are the only one I can ask."

"Fanfiction," Scully blurted out, only to shut him up. She didn't know what else to suggest and she had to say something, no matter how awkward it felt. This was the man (or person) who gave her his sperm to try to make a baby with. If she had to talk about, um, the current subject to return the favor, so be it. At least it was over the phone, so he couldn't see her face. She was sure she would start blushing soon, if it didn't already happen.

"Fanfiction? About what?" he immediately asked for clarifications. Of course he would!

"Us," Scully sighed. It was her dirty little secret, but a part of her always wanted to have someone to talk to about it. That part took over and didn't waste any time.

"Us?" Mulder was intrigued. "Who would want to write about us?"

"Lots of people, apparently. Remember Hollywood A.D.? That movie turned out to be quite a success."

" _That_ movie?!" Mulder exclaimed in disbelief. "I couldn't even finish watching it!"

"I remember," Scully chuckled. "You should give it another chance. It's not all that bad."

"Do you have it?" he wondered.

"Yes, I do," Scully smiled. She kept the tape, though she never watched it. She always preferred reading and fanfiction tended to be much more… mature than the movie. Not that she read it often, of course not, just on a few lonely nights…

"I have popcorn," Mulder suggested. "And beer. Bring it over and we'll watch it together."

"Now?" Well, she didn't see that coming! How would she get out of this proposal?

"Yes, now," Mulder confirmed. "Why not? Do you have other plans? Perhaps I should ask Skinner..."

"No! Don't call Skinner! I'll be right there."

She hung up, noticing that her hands started to shake slightly. She just admitted to her partner, her friend, that she thinks about him while… Oh God! And he brilliantly lured her to his place, using Skinner as bait.

How does he do that to her? No matter the occasion, he always finds a way to get her to come to him when he wants her. He drags her from family dinners, Christmas shopping, New Year's Eve, even her own death-bed… Not to mention countless baths! And she is always too powerless to refuse.

While she was getting ready for a "girls night" with Mulder, Scully realized that she actually wanted to go. Vixen was interesting, to say the least, and she couldn't help but want to get to know her better. She liked to feel needed too, as much as she didn't want to admit it. It was a great comfort to her that Mulder needed her just as much, if not more, even when he wasn't a man or even human.

She brought the tape and set it up, while Mulder made popcorn.

"I can't believe you don't want butter on your popcorn," Mulder frowned, giving her a bowl full of mentioned snack. "It's so un-American."

"Sit down and watch the movie," Scully smiled, taking the popcorn in one hand and beer in another. Mulder started the movie, but even as a woman he couldn't stand it. He barely lasted for the first half, then paused it and gave Scully a long, meaningful look.

"You really read fanfiction for this crap?" he asked her.

"I don't think about the movie while I read it," she shrugged.

"Then what do you think about?" he wondered.

Scully didn't answer and he didn't insist. They sat quietly for a while, but it was a comfortable rather than awkward silence. They absent-mindedly ate popcorn while contemplating how much to reveal to or demand from each other. They had so much to talk about, but now wasn't really the time for it.

Then again, it never was the right time.

"You think about him," Mulder finally stated. It wasn't even a question. He just wanted her to know that he knows.

"Him?" Scully was now utterly confused. Who was he talking about? About his real body or…

"Skinner," Mulder sighed. "It's ok, I understand."

"For God's sake, Mulder!" Scully was exasperated. "This again?!"

"Why do you keep denying it?" Mulder was failing at keeping his voice calm. "You said you kissed him!"

"Mulder, that was a year, maybe two ago! And it didn't mean anything!"

"Why did you do it, then? I never pegged you for a casual kisser."

"It just happened," Scully shrugged. "He gave me an important piece of information and I was extremely grateful. That's all!"

"What kind of information?"

"Your damn whereabouts! When you went to Bermuda Triangle."

"Oh…" now he looked embarrassed.

"It was all about you. It always is…" how was it possible that he doesn't know that? "You have to trust me."

"I do trust you, I just…" Mulder was mumbling miserably. "I know how he looks at you and now you tell me you kissed him and you watch movies about you two and read fanfiction about it…"

"The movie is not about Skinner and me," Scully informed him firmly. His obsession with Skinner was ridiculous. If he wanted him so much, he could have him, for all she cared!

"I saw the movie, Scully," Mulder insisted. "I know what it's about."

"No, you didn't see it," Scully reminded him. "You got insane over one joke and stormed out of the theater. You asked me to bring the movie this evening but you still don't want to finish watching it."

"I know how it ends. I don't need to see it."

"It's _not_ how it ends."

"With you and Skinner…"

"No. It ends with you and me."

"Oh?"

"And…"

"And what?"

"And…" Scully's voice was barely above whisper. "And a baby…"

Mulder sighed and placed his hand on hers, but she pulled it away. She stood up and went to the window, silently shedding a few tears away from his sight.

"But you'll be happy to know that it was just a movie," she said bitterly. "No need to worry about any of it happening in the real life!"

"I'm sorry," he said. He wanted to continue watching the movie now, but she didn't seem to be in the mood so he didn't mention it. He just sat there, trying to think of the right thing to say, but there didn't seem to be anything appropriate. It was his fault that she couldn't get the same kind of happy ending in real life. It was because of him that she got abducted and that her ova were harvested. He got a chance to correct that when he found them in the lab, but he blew it by keeping them in his damn pocket for too long. Even when they turned out to still be viable after all and he masturbated into a cup to fertilize them, they wouldn't take. That must have been his fault too, though he had no idea how.

"Skinner asked about you today," she finally spoke again, her back still turned to Mulder. "He came down to our office and made inquiries about Vixen. I told him you're married."

"Married…" Mulder repeated, not sure how to feel about that piece of information.

"Yeah, married," Scully turned around and looked at him, with a sad smile. "But the look of hurt on his face… I couldn't stand it. I said… I said you're going through a terrible divorce and you are not ready for another relationship yet."

"You let him keep hope," Mulder shook his head. "Why?"

"If…" she didn't want to think it, let alone say it, but it had to be said. "If we can't find Genia, and if this can't be fixed… I just want you to be happy."

"With him?"

"I want him to be happy too…" her voice broke.

"What about you?" Mulder asked gently.

"This isn't about me," Scully fiercely shook her head.

"Of course it is," Mulder insisted. "It's all about you."

"Mulder, please…"

"I have a theory, Scully," he seemingly changed the subject. "Do you want to hear it?"

"Finally," Scully smiled. "I was wondering about the lack of your crazy theories. It'd better be a good one!"

"Come back here and I'll tell you," Mulder patted the couch at the spot she was sitting on previously and she rejoined him, wiping a lonely tear from her cheek.

"How does it feel, Scully?" Mulder asked her. "I mean sex? I mean, for a woman?"

"I thought you were going to talk about your theory," Scully frowned.

"I'm getting there," Mulder assured her. "I just want to know how it feels. How did it feel with me?"

"Mulder! I don't want to talk about that!"

"With me or in general?"

"Mulder, please!"

"Did you tell anybody? Does anyone know?" Mulder insisted.

"No," she assured him, her voice firm and determined.

"Why?" he kept digging. Damn him!

"It's nobody's business, that's why," she said coldly, hoping he would get the hint and stop this inquiry.

"Do you want to talk about it?" he didn't get a hint. Figures!

"I…" Scully was getting more and more uncomfortable. "Mulder, why are you asking me this?"

"Because I think you're lonely," he stated. "You miss having a female friend."

"Mulder, I do have female friends!" Scully insisted. She may have lost touch with most of them, and haven't seen them in years, but… She had them!

"I know you do, but you can't talk to them," Mulder continued with his bizarre theory. "Not about our work, not about us. They just wouldn't understand. The things we go through… How could they possibly understand? But deep down you must wish you could share at least some of it with another woman. That's why you made me."

"Mulder, that's crazy!" Scully snapped. Enough was enough! "I didn't wish for a girlfriend, I wished for my partner back!"

"I know, but that's only what you said to Genia. I think she can pick up on things left unsaid. You wanted a dog, so she turned me into a dog. It could have been a cat or a cow, or any other animal, it would serve the purpose just the same, but you didn't want just any animal, you wanted a dog! You also lacked a female friend in a man's world, which is perfectly understandable. And now I even have a period because you wanted it!"

"Mulder, even if you're right, none of that would be worth losing you," her eyes were getting teary again, but so were his. Damn female sensitivity!

"I know," Mulder sighed. "I know. But Genia doesn't."

"Look, as far-fetched as it is, your theory is still useless," useless or not, it was breaking her heart and she didn't think she could bear to keep listening to it. "I don't care why this happened if it can't help us bring you back."

"What if it could?" Mulder offered.

"How?" Scully just couldn't see it.

"Give Vixen a purpose," Mulder explained. "Talk to her. Confide in her. When you no longer need her, she will be free to go and Fox can come back."

"Mulder, I don't know if you've noticed, but I've been talking to you for a while now and you are still here. It doesn't work."

"You are talking to him, not me."

"You ARE him!"

"No, I'm not. I once was, but not anymore. I'm Vixen. You made me, you named me, I'm here for you and only you. You can tell me… what you can't tell him."

"Do you promise not to tell him?" Scully asked, only half-jokingly, after contemplating it for a few seconds. Vixen smiled encouragingly, but didn't say anything, trying not to rush her.

"Okay," Scully sighed. She closed her eyes and leaned back, getting comfortable on the familiar black couch. How does it feel to have sex for a woman? How does it feel to have a friend to talk about it? How was it… With him? "It was… It was warm… Friendly… I felt safe, protected. I just wanted him to like it. I wanted it to be all about him."

"What about you? Did you like it?" Vixen nudged her.

"How could I not?" Scully admitted.

"Do you love him?" Vixen asked with a shaky voice, sure that she would get her ass kicked for daring to ask such a thing, but it strangely didn't happen. Scully remained calm and cooperative.

"Of course," she responded simply.

"Did you tell him that?" Vixen asked, when she really wanted to ask why she _didn't_ tell him. Or better yet, why she'd never let him say it to her. Perhaps they could get to that later…

"No," Scully chuckled, keeping her eyes closed. She felt like a teenager talking to her best friend. It felt good and she didn't want to stop. "My mother keeps asking me the same thing, but no, I didn't."

"Why not?" There. The question was out. Now what?

"Because it's just words," Scully was honest. "It doesn't even begin to describe what I feel for him. And he knows it. We don't need words."

"Do you want it to happen again?" Vixen barely dared to ask. She didn't know what answer to hope for. She wanted to be wanted by Scully, at least Fox would have wanted that, but it would also rob Vixen of her femininity and she wasn't ready for that.

"No, it can't! I can't," Scully's tears were openly falling now, but she didn't care. As long as she kept her eyes closed she felt safe. She kept it inside for too long and she couldn't hold it anymore. She had to tell it to someone, even if it didn't bring Mulder back.

"Why not?" Vixen asked gently, not judging, not commenting, just being there and listening.

"I thought," Scully continued through sobbing. "I thought if it turned out that I wasn't barren after all, if my periods kept coming and… We could have a chance… But… It didn't come… And… I don't want to do that… to him. He can still be a father! He's very fertile, his… His sample was strong… And… And… I know he wouldn't care, he would accept me, but I can't accept myself… That's… the thing… I would never forgive myself if I didn't give him a chance… That's what I want for him and… At least… I… If he said no, I wouldn't do it. Not with a stranger. If it wasn't with him I didn't want that chance. And maybe… Maybe he feels the same for me and now… maybe… I might never know. I might have lost him forever. And I didn't give him a chance… I… I'm not good enough for him, but nobody… Nobody else will be good enough for him… I couldn't… live… with that…"

Scully was sobbing hard, but Vixen wasn't far behind her, unable to keep her own tears. She didn't say anything, just pulled her close into a tight embrace and gently rocked with her.

"Don't tell him," Scully cried in Vixen's arms. "Please don't tell him."

"I won't," Vixen assured her. "You will tell him yourself. Whenever you're ready."

"I don't think I'll ever be ready," Scully admitted her biggest fear. Everybody realized it before her, Lone Gunmen, her mother, even that smoking son of a bitch! But Mulder… He's been waiting to hear it for a long time and he would keep waiting for as long as she needed, she was sure of that. No other man was ever willing to wait for her, without asking for anything in return. No other man ever would.

"You will be," Vixen affirmed. "Soon. I know you. I believe in you."

They sat like that for what seemed forever, just holding each other and trying to stop thinking about Scully's words and their meaning. What she said surprised both of them and neither was ready to act on it. It might have been a right time, maybe even a right place, but it was the wrong body.

Suddenly, there was a loud knock at the door. They both raised their heads in surprise, then looked at each other questionably.

"It's Genia," Vixen smiled. "She's back! I've told you it'd work!"

"How do you know it's her?" Scully was suspicious.

"Who else could it be?" Vixen shrugged, getting up and heading towards the door. "I'm not expecting anybody else, and, except for you, I don't get many unexpected visitors. And you're already here, so…"

Scully stood up as well and followed her, her heart racing. Could it really be Genia? Could this nightmare be over? She was excited, but also nervous. What happens next? How will she deal with it?

Vixen cheerfully opened the door, but then she froze in place, terrified beyond words.

It wasn't Genia.

Both women stared at the visitor and he stared back, serious and intimidating. The air was so thick with tension that Vixen could hardly breathe. She was in trouble, big trouble, that much was perfectly clear.

"Hello, Vixen," Skinner finally spoke. "Or should I say _Fox_?"


	18. Skinner's job

"This isn't what it looks like!" Scully rushed to explain, but one look from Skinner was enough to quiet her. He let himself inside, not waiting for his agents to pull themselves together and invite him in, and closed the door behind him, still blocking it with his body to prevent them from coming to an idea of escaping.

"How long did you two think you could hide this from me?" he asked firmly. Neither of the women dared to look him in the eyes. Tip of the nose, cheek, forehead, yes, but not the eyes. For Scully, at least. Vixen just stared at the floor.

"How did you find out?" Scully finally gained courage to ask. There was no point to keep denying it. They worked with Skinner for years, they've been through a lot together and no matter how awkward and humiliating, he deserved to know the truth, at least now that he seemed to already know it.

"I work for the FBI," Skinner calmly explained. "Did you really think I wouldn't check on Vixen Mulder and her abusing husband? Do you know what I've found, agents?"

"Nothing," Vixen guessed.

"There is no Vixen Mulder," Scully added.

"No, there isn't," Skinner agreed. "Which reminds me, where is your dog, agent Scully?"

"There is no dog, either," Scully admitted.

"And no more wishes left for you, I suppose," Skinner concluded.

Both women took a deep breath. Their mischief was uncovered and they braced themselves for the inevitable punishment. They couldn't help not to be impressed, though. Skinner must've been a genius for figuring all that out. That, or the Lone Gunmen were assholes who couldn't be trusted.

"No," Scully obediently confessed. "No more wishes. I blew them all."

"I went through your files," Skinner sounded contented, as if he wanted to brag. "I've looked into your last case. A genie! It didn't make much sense at first, but the more I thought about it, the more things fell in place. You calling both the dog and the woman Mulder, while real Mulder is nowhere to be seen… Vixen - a female Fox!" He turned to Vixen. "You calling me sir, recognizing my car… There was something about you that wouldn't leave me alone, but I couldn't quite point it out. I thought," he started to laugh at this point. "I thought it could be love!"

"I'm sorry," Vixen stated miserably, but Skinner didn't even hear her, he was laughing so hard. They never saw him laugh before, so they didn't know what to make of it. One thing was sure, though, it made him look that much more attractive, and Vixen couldn't help not to notice it.

"I wanted to tell you, sir," Scully tried to assure him, as if it could make a difference at this point.

"But this one had other plans for me," Skinner teased the other woman, catching his breath. Damn, he was good! There wasn't any secret they could efficiently hide from him for long. The only thing left for Vixen to do was to disappear from the face of the Earth or die from embarrassment right there, right then.

"Lighten up, Mulder," Skinner playfully patted her on the back. "I don't hit women."

"Thank you, sir," was all Vixen could think of saying.

"I am still going to kick your butt," Skinner assured her. "But first I'm going to help your partner turn you into a man again. As much as I prefer this version, trust me, I do, but I don't want to be the one to explain to my superiors your sudden… transformation. I need you back in the office as soon as possible."

"Why?" Scully asked. "Is something wrong?"

"It's your department," Skinner told her. "They want to evaluate you."

"Evaluate what?" Scully was alarmed.

"I think it's the budget this time. Your expenses are frowned upon and they are looking for ways to cut them. I think they want to keep you in the office and limit your field work."

"They can't do that!" Vixen protested. "I can't do my job from the office!"

"They can certainly try," Skinner was not optimistic. "They are always looking for a reason to close the X files and this time I don't think there's much I can do about it. Your expenses are one of the highest in the Bureau and your results are… not."

"Well, we'll see about that," Vixen mumbled stubbornly. She'd lost her manhood without a fight and she wasn't willing to give up her work as well. "I will come to a meeting. I can dress like a man. They won't see the difference."

Scully and Skinner both instinctively looked at her huge breasts and both said at the same time: "I don't think so."

"Well, do you have a better idea?" Vixen snapped at them, feeling completely useless and frustrated about it. Biologically, she was a woman, but legally she was still a man and neither of those genders served any purpose in her life. For all practical intent, they were both a disability.

"I might have," Skinner answered. "If you would be so kind to calm down and listen."

"Um, yes, sir," Vixen mumbled, lowering her head in embarrassment. "I'm sorry, sir."

"Look at me, Mulder," Skinner demanded, but Vixen just couldn't brace herself to do it.

"I _am_ sorry," she said to the floor. "I don't know how it happened... I don't know what I was thinking…"

"Oh for crying out loud!" Skinner was losing patience. "That kiss was hardly the worst thing you ever did to me! You've been nothing but trouble ever since I've met you. You've already attacked me, jeopardized my job and life, and I've been on the other end of your gun multiple times. Yet, I'm still here, at your apartment, saving your ass again. I assure you, I can survive a simple kiss just the same."

"Yes, sir. Thank you, sir," Vixen replied miserably. A _simple_ kiss? _Simple_?! There was nothing _simple_ about it for her! Did he really not feel it? Or did he just say that to hurt her?

"What's the plan, sir?" Scully tried to change the subject. Simple or not, she didn't want to know anything about their _moment_.

"Scully," Skinner said much warmer this time. "I've found her. I've found your genie."

"How?" Scully stared at him in disbelief. "Where? We've had Lone Gunmen search for her a whole day and they couldn't find anything!"

"Lone Gunmen don't have my contacts and resources," Skinner said simply, not willing to elaborate.

"Where is she?" Vixen asked.

"I told her to come to my office tomorrow morning," Skinner answered. "It gives us enough time to figure out how to formulate a wish in order to avoid another catastrophe."

"Sir, I think…" Scully tried to suggest, but Skinner cut her off. "No, Scully, you've had your chance. Now it's my turn. My wish. You just try to get some sleep."

As if any of them would be able to sleep tonight…

Skinner was already at the door, when he turned to Vixen. "Come walk me to the car, Mulder," he told her. She looked at Scully in panic, but her partner wasn't of any help. She just nodded for her to do as she was told. "Go with him. I'll wait here."

Not knowing how to get out of it, Vixen obediently followed Skinner to the hall, then to the elevator. She hardly dared to breathe, partly because of fear, and partly because Skinner's smell was intoxicating and she didn't trust herself to handle it appropriately. Not that she knew what was appropriate with this man, or any man really. She used to think dealing with the opposite sex was easier for women, but now she wasn't so sure about it.

"So," Skinner asked her. "How does it feel?"

"How does what feel?" Vixen was confused. _Your lips? Your proximity? Your tender hands? The sound of your voice?_

"Being a woman," Skinner clarified and Vixen wasn't as relieved as she expected to be that he wasn't talking about his lips. "You know, from a man's perspective. You are in a unique position to talk about that."

"Oh," Vixen didn't know what to say. "It's like a… rollercoaster."

"Rollercoaster?" Skinner raised his eyebrows.

"Yeah, um," Vixen was looking for words, and failing at it. "It's like being a man. But different."

"Oh," Skinner sounded disappointed.

They left the elevator and walked to the car in awkward silence.

"See you tomorrow," Skinner reminded her, opening the car door. "Don't be late. And don't worry. We'll get you back."

"Sir…" Vixen addressed him, when he was already inside. Skinner raised his head, looking at her expectantly.

"Why are you doing this?" she asked. "You could have anything you wanted. Why are you wasting your wish on me?"

"Because," Skinner looked at her as if she asked the stupidest question he has ever heard. "It's my damn job."

He then slammed the door and drove off, leaving Vixen to stand on the parking lot for a while, until she remembered that Scully was waiting for her upstairs. She went back to her apartment on autopilot, not allowing herself to think or feel anything…


	19. The End

"So, do you want to finish the movie?" Scully didn't know what else to say.

"No," Vixen shook her head. "Not now."

"Do you want me to stay?" Scully offered.

"I think you'd better go," Vixen sighed. "I'd rather be alone right now."

"I'll pick you up in the morning," Scully nodded. She then took her purse and left. There really wasn't anything else she could do.

Neither of the women got much sleep that night. They both stared at the ceiling a lot, watching the shadows and trying to imagine what it would be like to become a man. Neither of them succeeded, Vixen maybe even less than Scully. She could remember it, but she couldn't feel it, in the same way that you can remember your first lover and what you felt for him, but you can't feel it again. It might have easily been someone else's life.

Morning came fast anyway.

"You're late," Vixen told Scully when she came back for her.

"Yeah, I was…" Scully stopped herself in time before admitting that she was throwing up again, even feeling a little dizzy. She still believed it was nothing more than stress and she didn't want Mulder to worry. Poor Vixen had enough on her mind already. "I was in a traffic jam. Are you ready?"

"As ready as I'll ever be," Vixen shrugged. "Let's go."

Scully noticed that Vixen wasn't wearing female clothes anymore, but old Mulder's comfort T-shirt and sweat pants. She probably slept in it and didn't bother to change in the morning. It was hardly appropriate outfit for the Federal building, but Scully restrained herself from commenting. If it could help her partner with upcoming transition, so be it. Mulder was known for breaking much more important rules than a dress code.

They drove in silence, and when they exited the car they just stood there quietly for a few moments.

"We have to go inside," Scully finally said.

"I know," Vixen acknowledged, not moving at all.

"Are you ok?" Scully was getting worried.

"Yeah," Vixen nodded. "I just… I was wondering, if we can wish whatever we want, can I get a peg leg this time?"

"It's Skinner's wish," Scully smiled, reminding her. "I highly doubt he would go for it."

"I guess not, then," Vixen shrugged.

"Are you okay with this, Mulder?" Scully asked gently.

"Would you be?" Vixen wondered bitterly.

"It's the right thing to do, you'll see," Scully tried to assure her. "Maybe you won't even remember any of this."

"Is that supposed to make me feel better?" Vixen was not hiding her displeasure.

Scully just sighed, placed a hand on the small of her back and guided her inside. There was no point in discussing it anymore. Even if they wanted to change anything, they couldn't. It was Skinner's wish this time, Skinner's rules.

He waited for them in their basement office, together with Genia, in the same place where it all started only a week ago, though it seemed like a lifetime.

"I wish to undo Scully's wishes," Skinner wasn't wasting any time.

"You can't do that," Genia objected. "You are not allowed to affect other people's wishes, only to come up with your own."

"Wish him back, sir," Scully pleaded.

"I'm trying, Scully!" Skinner snapped at her nervously.

"No, I mean, ask her to make Mulder exactly the same as he was before my first wish," Scully clarified.

"That could work," Skinner agreed after considering it for a moment.

"What do you think?" Scully turned to Mulder.

"I think that should do it," Mulder nodded. "You'll get what you want, and I won't even remember any of it."

"Will you believe me if I ever try to paraphrase it?" Scully tried to make a joke to lighten the situation.

"No chance in hell!" Vixen grinned. "But I'll enjoy watching you try."

"I'm sure you will," Scully smiled, embracing her in a spontaneous hug.

"Will you tell him?" Vixen whispered into her ear, hoping that Skinner wouldn't hear.

"I will," Scully whispered back.

"Promise me, Scully," Vixen insisted. "Don't let all this be for nothing."

"I promise," Scully assured her, breaking the hug, but taking Vixen's hands into her own and locking her eyes with her. She wasn't going to let her go through this alone. "Are you ready?"

"I'm ready," Vixen confirmed.

"So am I," Scully nodded.

"All right," Skinner took it as a hint to get started. "I wish for Mulder to be exactly the same as he was before Scully made her first wish."

He blinked, merely blinked, and the two women standing in front of him were now one woman and one man. Mulder and Scully, just as he remembered them.

Scully gasped through tears and relief, looking at Fox Mulder with great wonder, as if she was seeing him for the first time. Just to make sure he was real she raised her hands to his cheeks, but it wasn't enough so she pulled his head down and pressed her lips to his in a starving kiss.

First she tried to make a baby with him. Then she slept with him. Now was the time for a first proper kiss. Wasn't that the right order in which to do these things? It seemed perfectly regular to her.

"Couldn't she wait for us to leave before doing that?" Genia rolled her eyes in disgust.

"She waited seven years to do that," Skinner informed her with a smile. He would have the time later to figure out if Scully's behavior was against the rules or not, but right now he was just relieved that the wish worked.

"What was that for?" Mulder asked when Scully finally pulled away from him.

"For being you," Scully smiled, blushing all over.

"So," Genia turned to Skinner. "Are you ready for your next wish?"

"Next wish?" the question caught him off guard. He didn't really think of that, but now that she mentioned it, he was instantly overwhelmed with possibilities.

"Yes, the next one!" Genia rolled her eyes again, this time at him. "You still have two of them left."

"Um, well, can we talk about that in my office?"

"Sure," Genia agreed and vanished. Skinner, however, had to use the elevator. He rushed to it, not wasting any time and forgetting all about Mulder and Scully for the time being.

"Is everything all right?" Mulder asked Scully when they were left alone, visibly worried.

"You don't remember being a dog or a woman for about a week?" Scully was just checking, though it seemed pretty clear that he didn't remember. She would later have to come up with an explanation for him wearing a bra and for the blood in his underwear – Skinner forgot to specify the clothes.

"No," Mulder answered with a very puzzled look, the one that he had probably picked up from Scully during all of his years with her.

"Then I guess everything's okay," Scully smiled, pulling him into yet another kiss.

 **The End**


End file.
